Chapter Eleven
Paco tells us grufflyto make use of his study for privacy, and Madeleine walks past me without looking my way.
I follow her inside and close the door behind me. She stiffens visibly as soon as I turn around to face her, and remorse slashes into me when I see that her eyes are puffy from crying.
"I'm sorry, Madeleine."
"You're forgiven." Her words come out stilted, and I have my first taste of fear when she still refuses to look my way.
In the past, she used to stare at me all the time.
She even called me Mr. Mine, back when she didn't know who I was.
Have I lost her for good?
"I know you have every right to hate me," I say tautly, "but if you could let me explain..."
Madeleine lifts her shoulders in an awkward shrug. "I just don't see the point—-"
"The point," I cut in grimly, "is that I love you."
And that's when she finally looks at me.
And that's also when I see how much I've hurt her.
"I'm sorry—-"
"Then go," she says brokenly. "If you're really sorry, just leave—-"
"I can't. I love you—-"
A choked cry escapes her. "Do you really think I'm that stupid?"
"Just listen to me, alright? Just please, just listen—-please."
I tell her about the first day we met, and why I had to walk away. I tell her everything because I know now how much my lies have cost her, but all she does is look at me with glassy eyes.
It feels like she's slipping further and further from me, and I don't fucking know what else I can say or do to make her believe me.
"You can ask Adam yourself," I say urgently. "I told him about you. I told him you were different, and that I wanted to choose you over my duty. And when I saw you with that boy, everything just became fucking clear. I knew then that I loved you—-"
But Madeleine only cuts me off. "Please stop saying that. Just stop." Her voice catches in the end, and my heart fucking splinters.
"Didn't Grandpa tell you? The island's all yours. It's yours, okay? It's all yours."
My Madeleine is babbling, and it kills me to hear her do so.
"So p-please. Please stop lying."
"I'm not lying—-"
"The island is yours," she whispers. "So what more do you want?"
"I want you," I grit out, "not the fucking island—-"
"Stop! Lying!"
"It's no lie, Madeleine. I love you—-"
I move towards her as I speak, and her hand lands against my cheek with such force that my head snaps to the side.
"I'm s-sorry." She chokes back a sob. "I didn't mean to—-"
"Madeleine, please—-"
She shakes her head wildly. "There's nothing you can say that will change my mind. So please, let's just end it here. Don't ever speak to me again. Don't ever show yourself to me again or I swear, I s-swear I'll make Grandpa sell the island to your worst enemy—-"
"Then do it."