Sitting in the quiet restaurant, I shifted again in my chair as I waited, hopeful this would be the turning point I needed. I’d already been denied a new court date, the hope I’d had earlier in the week flaming out. The only benefit was it gave me more time to gather all my weapons because now I was preparing to strike. My meeting tonight was the lynchpin I’d been waiting for.
I’d been attempting to schedule a meeting with him since Levi had been stolen from me. Finally, there had been an opening in his schedule. I didn’t quite know everything he did or what his job entailed, but I knew he was the best, a rare good guy in the midst of assholes.
We’d met several years ago randomly through hockey and kept in contact. I’d helped him out a few times with some legal stuff, and he’d always told me to call him if I ever needed help, my last Hail Mary, so to speak, and he’d be there. I hadn’t ever needed him until now.
The timing just sucked, making me once again have to choose something over Loren.
Thankfully, things there had started to improve, and were headed back in the direction I wanted. Staying away from her had been hard, but I knew it had been necessary. Not because Brittni had threatened her, but because I knew if I had let Loren get involved, she would’ve either come to resent me when I inevitably pulled away or lost herself in my fight. She’d changed so much and had enough on her own plate. I couldn’t bear to burden her with mine right then.
Jude had mentioned the wedding to me earlier in the week, and when the date mirrored my meeting, I felt hopeless. When I’d met Nicco in the weird elevator ride, I’d seen the solution. I hadn’t known what he’d meant to her until I saw it on her face, and I realized it was an opportunity to make amends and give her what she needed.
It was then I understood the luxury of her dating multiple people at once. I didn’t have to be everything or do it all. I couldn’t anyway, not with Levi, nor did I think she would ask me to. It didn’t stop me from wanting to, though. At least this way, I could be part of her life without feeling like a constant failure.
I’d always imagined the perfect relationship including Wells anyhow, so including more guys wasn’t a big leap for me. Nevertheless, I wasn’t certain whether or not that feeling would last once I had my life back in order. Would I be jealous when she was with the others? Would I feel like I was constantly waiting on the sidelines, only called in when I had value? In theory, I was on board. It would be interesting to see how it played out in real life to know if it was viable.
Nicco seemed like a decent guy, though, and I could tell he cared for her based on how he responded to my questioning. I felt compassion for the guy in the end, and I decided to help. I mentioned he could earn brownie points by attending this wedding. I only hoped he took me up on the advice. I guess it would be a test of whether things would be successful or not. Could we help one another or would we let jealousy get in the way?
When I finally spotted my friend walking through the space, I stood to greet him.
“Monroe. I’m glad we were finally able to find some time.” He reached in to shake my hand, pulling me into a hug, slapping my back with his other hand.
“Me too, Logan. Thank you for coming to Chicago.”
We took our seats, the waiter immediately appearing to take our drink order before quickly walking away to fill it. The service here was exemplary.
“I apologize it’s taken so long. Things have been a bit chaotic with the new company getting off. I’m still closing out some of my old assignments as well.”
“Ah, yes. How is all that going?”
“It’s good, weird,” he grinned, “but good. I feel lighter in a lot of ways than I have in years, but there’s still that lingering feeling that the other shoe will drop the moment I stop worrying about it.”
“Oh, yes. I know that feeling well.” I chuckled just as the waiter sat our drinks down, and we ordered, sending him on his way.
“So, from your message, your ex has taken full custody of your son?”
“Correct. She’s claiming neglect and violation of the custody order when I had my neighbor watch him.”
“What have you gathered so far? Knowing you,” he smiled, “you’ve been thorough.”
The confirmation was nice to hear. “I have documentation proving she was having an affair long before our divorce, as well as who spent the most time with him parenting-wise before and after. And while that should be enough to sway any judge, this one has either been bought or has a grudge to prove.”
“You said you believe the judge was part of this investment scheme your friend was connected to?”
Nodding, I took a sip of my drink, the hidden shame I felt for Wells’ involvement rising to the surface. I didn’t like to admit that part of me was angry with him for falling into the trap, wanting to take the easy way out to get the life he’d always wanted. The more significant part of me, though, felt responsible for his downfall. I’d always been the one to stop him in the past, his voice of reason, but when he’d pushed me away, I’d been hurt and wanted him to miss me.
It wasn’t something I liked to admit about myself, that I desired to feel needed to feel worthy. Classic foster care kid syndrome, I suppose. I found a way to survive when it became dependent on others. If you made yourself useful, invaluable, they wouldn’t want to get rid of you.
It had transitioned over in my teen years into social relationships, and I’d become so used to being everything for everyone else, I forgot what I needed. In a way, it was how the Komodo side of me was born. The times I needed to be relentless and unforgiving to survive, overriding my natural instincts to sacrifice myself for others. It was rare, but the few times I’d been pushed too far, I found the coldness comforting as I struck my foes down, avenging all the wrongs done to me.
It wasn’t my natural state or something I took pleasure in doing, and the one time I needed Wells to step up, to show me I was worth fighting for, he hadn’t. Worse, he’d ruined his life in the process.
I loved the man, but resentment and disappointment now coated the one thing I never doubted before. A part of me feared that once I was no longer of use to him, I’d be discarded just as easily. Wells’ inability to make a commitment, to follow through on what he said, triggered all my insecurities. If he hadn’t been able to give it to me before, why would he now? Logan’s question had inadvertently stirred up a lot of things I hadn’t been ready to face, especially Wells’ admission of feelings the other night.
Swallowing another gulp, I placed the glass back down and looked up. “While he wasn’t charged officially with anything, the damage had been done. The company named him in the scandal, wanting to have a scapegoat and separate themselves from the fallout. Wells was caught up in the blowback, losing everything in the process. Because nothing could be reaped back, everyone connected lost millions, and I think the judge sees this as a way to take his pound of flesh. He might even be getting some compensation from Brittni, I don’t know. It’s hard to prove anything. She either covered it up well and has been playing dumb this whole time, or she hired someone to do it for her. Who knows what they’re doing. She’s definitely sleeping with her lawyer, and I’ve debated telling her husband to see if he could be an asset.”
Logan watched me, a thoughtful look on his face the whole time. He started to answer when our food arrived, interrupting him.
“Here you go, gentlemen. Let me know if you need anything else, and I hope you enjoy your meal.”