“No, I can’t do that. There’s way too much going on.”
“I know Melissa would let you take a short leave of absence and I also know your fellow assistant D.A.s can handle the caseload without you for a little while.”
“Dad, I just…”
“Please think about it. Take some time for yourself so the deep wound inside your heart can start healing. It’s so very important that you do.”
“I know, and yes, I’ll think about taking some time off even though I don’t want to. Okay?”
“Okay. I love you, daughter of mine.”
“I love you too.”
“Hang in there and call me if you need anything.”
“I will.”
“Bye.”
“Bye, Dad.”
After we hung up, I put on my swimsuit, walked outside into the backyard, and then jumped into my pool. Swimming my usual laps wasn’t going to happen on this day—this incredibly shitty day. All I wanted to do was float on my back and stare up at the blue sky, so that’s what I did. I also began examining my role in the ending of my marriage to my high school sweetheart. A man who said I didn’t love him enough. Then I began crying out all the tears that I’d been holding inside.
3
#theoldme
Stevie
Three weeks later
“YOU’RE REALLY TAKINGback your maiden name?” Melissa asked me.
She was the district attorney of Austin, Texas, she was tough as nails, she was my boss and also a close friend, and the two of us were sitting in my office.
“Yes, a clean slate all the way around. Besides, I’m a Sinclair through and through. Not a Jones,” I said.
“You’re gonna have to change your driver’s license, social security card, bank accounts, credit cards. Everything.”
“I know, and one by one, I’ll start marking off that list.”
Melissa glanced down at my left hand. “What’d you do with your wedding ring?”
“I didn’t flush it down the toilet or pawn it like you’re thinking I did.”
“Good.”
“Whygood?”
“Because you can always have it melted down and made into something else.”
I shook my head. “No, I don’t think so. I’m just gonna keep it put up until I decide what to do with it.”
“Alrighty then. I’ll let you get back to work. Let me know if I can do anything for you, though.”
“I will, and thanks.”
Melissa gave me a sympathetic smile and then turned to go back to her office, but not before I called her back to mine.