Eric eventually pulled back and said, “I’m an addict. I’ve been sober for six months now, and I know my addiction has caused nothing but pain. For that, I’m sorry. I spent too many years numbing the hurt of my childhood with pills. At first, I talked myself into believing they were good for me since they helped me not feel so angry and depressed all the time. But then something happened.”
He shut his eyes from the pain for a moment before he opened them again. “That something was Dad dying. I never got to tell him how terrible he was as a father. I did what he told me and never stood up to him, taking his abuse my entire life. So when he died, that angry, hurt part of me let loose, and there was no holding it back.”
“Oh, Eric. You could have talked to me.” Lola rested her head on his shoulders and wrapped her arm around his back.
“But I was the one who was supposed to protect you.”
“You’re not a robot, Eric. You weren’t designed to do only one task—to only help your sister.”
Eric rubbed his face. The way he looked at me, it was as if he aged thirty years before my eyes.
“But that’s all I’ve ever known.” He sighed. “When I found out about you two being together, behind my back, I was angry. So. Very. Angry.”
I swallowed, unsure where he was going with all of it.
“And then it hit me... The two people I cared about the most were together. I should have been happy, yet I wasn’t. You shouldn’t have been scared to come to me with how you felt, but you were. I frightened the people I loved. And that’s when I realized I had turned into the man I hated most in the world for that exact reason. I became Dad.”
We were silent for a moment.
Eric stood straight. “That’s why I brought you two together. To make up for lost time. It was my fault Lola ran, and therefore, I must amend it by marrying you two.”
Chapter 12
Lola
“What was that? Marriage?” I couldn’t hold my laughter in any longer.
Jenner quietly shut one of the bedroom doors in the Hudson estate. “It’s crazy, right? He wants to marry us.” He smiled, causing his dimple to appear.
My heart skipped a beat, and my laughter subsided.
I cleared my throat. “Totally insane. I’m glad Eric is working on his addiction issues, but I’m pretty sure making amends doesn’t mean forcing people into marriage. It’s sort of the whole reason I left to begin with.”
Jenner’s dimple disappeared. “So, it was me? I’m the reason you left?”
“What? No.” I thought about it for a second and winced. “Actually, you were part of the reason I ran.”
He rubbed his brow and turned his back, making his way to the large picture window that overlooked the front of the estate. The room had dark wood paneling and reminded me of an old Victorian mansion. They covered the bed and furniture in tarps, giving the room an eerie feeling.
“I knew it. Deep inside, I knew you didn’t feel for me the way I felt for you.”
“No, Jenner, that’s not it at all.” I hurried over to him and tried to touch his shoulder, but he shrugged me off.
“Then what do you mean? I was part of the reason you ran?”
I gazed up into his chocolate eyes and watched them harden. I hated that I did this to him. That I hurt my brother and kept Jenni away from the people who would love her.
“You told me once...” I gazed around the room. “In this very room, I think. You explained that you never wanted to have children, that they were nothing but a burden. That you didn’t want to end up like your father and hating his children so much that he left and never looked back.”
I hadn’t realized I had wrapped my arms around my stomach, shielding myself from what was about to be slung my way, until I tightened my hold. I couldn’t read his mind, but I knew this would end with him not wanting any part of Jenni’s life.
And that hurt the most. He could say he never loved me; he could say he only ever used me. But I wouldn’t be able to handle Jenner meeting Jenni and then turning his back on her.
Jenner stood there, his dark eyes softening. He reached out, pulling my arms apart and wrapping his around me.
He held me for a moment and sighed, his hot breath dancing over my head and down my neck. I nuzzled my head into his chest because, despite everything, I missed him. I wanted to be hardened and turn away, to demand he be a father to Jenni or leave me alone.
But I was weak. I had always had men protecting me. Why did I believe I could ever stand up to them? If Jenner said he wanted me right here, right now, I’d bend like the weakest flower and open for him.