"Yeah, she's talked to me about it. I think she should be the one you are asking, though."
I won't talk to her mother about this.
"I don't know what happened to us." She admits as a single tear falls down her cheek. "She used to be so different. I feel like I don't even know her anymore."
I don't think she knows anything about her. No one in her old life seems to know anything. They don't understand that the Blake they thought they knew is 6 feet deep and gone. I think she finally feels free from her old life, starting over and doing what she wants for once. I can tell her mother doesn't understand why I am here, and honestly, I can't explain it to her. I am so in love with her, it's nearly blinding and clouding all of my judgment.
CHAPTER 28
BLAKELY
November 27- Thanksgiving
Judson is sitting in the chair next to the bed, his perfect head laying across my stomach. I am so thirsty and feel high from all the pain meds. I adjust myself in the bed and manage to croak out Judson’s name.
His head shoots up, “Blake? Oh my God, you scared me to death.” He quickly gets to his feet and passes me a cup of water. I try to lift my arm that all of a sudden feels so heavy.
“Why can’t I feel my arm?” I am now obviously freaking out, and the medicine makes me feel a little bit crabby. Judson turns back to sit the water down, he doesn’t respond right away, and I can tell he is avoiding my question.
“What the fuck is wrong with my hand Judson!” I snap at him, he looks at me with glassy eyes, and I instantly feel regretful for yelling at him.
“It’s broken, they did operate, but the nerve damage is severe. The doctor said they almost had to amputate.” His words ring in my ears, and I can’t form words.
“What does that mean?”
“It means they don’t know if you will be able to use your hand. It’s a waiting game.”
“Honey! I am so glad you are awake!” My mom comes barreling in the door and straight to the bedside, coffee in tow. Basically knocking Judson out of her way. My eyes fill with tears, and I am quite positive they are tears of joy, but the medicine makes it hard to tell.
“I called your primary doctor, and they are getting therapy, and everything set up for you.” What? Why is she talking to the doctors?
“I need a new doctor, I think, since I’ll be here, right?” She looks at me then to Judson. Did he tell her he doesn’t want me here?
“Honey, don’t you think it’s time to come home?”
“I am home.” I snap at her. Judson’s eyes get as wide as saucers. He walks over to the bed and places his hand on the back of my shoulder.
She doesn’t know what to say. I feel a little bitchy, but I am so tired of doing what everyone wants. I am going to do what I want. “Mom, can I have a minute alone with Judson?” She rolls her eyes and walks out, pulling the sliding door closed behind her.
“Do you want me to leave?” I ask him point-blank.
“What?” He pulls my forehead to his lips and pulls back, looking directly into my soul. “I love you, Blake. Leaving is the last thing I want you to do.”
What?
He wipes the tears away from my eyes and pulls me into a hug.
“Are you sure about that because look at me, I am a walking trainwreck?” He chuckles a little and looks me in the eyes.
“I have never been more sure. I haven’t known you long, but I know that you are the one. I knew the second I saw you standing there with your arms crossed and attitude blazing off of you.”
I pull him closer, and his lips crash into mine. I forget everything. I forget what happened with Dakota, forget that the life I’ve been living is a mess, forget about everything before this moment.
“I love you too, Judson.”
He looks into my eyes as if I am the only woman he has ever seen. Like I’m the only girl in the world. No one has ever looked at me like this, with such adoration and love. He glances down at my wrist wrapped up.
“They are going to move you to another step-down room, and we will talk with the doctors and see if we can get you a local doctor and therapist.” I think for a second about how much all of this will cost. Thankfully, I am still on my mom’s insurance for now, but I’m not sure she will keep me on there living here. I push those thoughts out of my mind and remember I have a job and have been making pretty good money.