"My mother drowned the summer before I turned five." The ache in my chest expands. I'm not having an episode; it's a different kind of pain. Sorrow? Regret? "I was the one who found her." I wring my hands together on the marble counter, unable to look at either of them. "My father was at work, and Oli was at a friend's house. Mom and I were alone." I inhale slowly. "I screamed for help."Exhale. "But no one heard me. We lived on a large property that used to belong to my mother's family. Our neighbors were miles away."Inhale. "Dad and Oli found me by the pool. My voice was so hoarse from crying for hours that I couldn't tell anyone what happened."
"Oh, my god," Lilly whispers. She reaches out, her fingers hovering above mine. She saw me with Oli earlier and witnessed how he was unable to touch me. Is that why she is waiting?
I flip over my palm, signaling to her that it's okay.
"What happened?" Rhys voices the question I was waiting for.
I squeeze my best friend's hand, drawing strength from her. "My mother wasn't doing well. She was on medication. Dad and Celine never talk about her, and Oli was just as young as me. He has more memories of her, but he can't remember her…bad days, as Celine called them. I overheard her and my father sometimes when they thought we were asleep, but they never said anything in front of us."
"Do you know what kind of medication?" Lilly returns my tight hold.
"I have a suspicion."One I am not ready to explain.
"Is that the reason you disappeared the night McKenna…" She trails off. I'm about to respond when a shudder runs down my spine. I whip my head to the side and take in Lilly's expression. She's focused on a reflection in the kitchen's patio door. Slowly turning my head, I lock eyes with Marcus.
No one speaks, and a hollow void settles in my core. How much did he hear?
"I came early to relieve Ben. He's still not a hundred percent," Marcus explains his presence. His face is a blank mask, eyes never straying from mine, and my heart flips.
"Sounds good, man." Rhys breaks the awkwardness, and everyone's attention shifts to him. "Well, I'm gonna go work out, then. Calla, you should try to get another hour of sleep. I have a suspicion that tonight will be another repeat of the last few."
It's then that I notice the dark circles under his eyes. "Is there anything I can help with?" I offer.
He waves me off. "Nah, it's all good. That's what caffeine is for, right?" He trudges over to Lilly, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. "Let's go get you to bed, babe. I'll have to change, and maybe we—"
Lilly slugs him in the arm. "If you ask me to have sex with you right now, you can take care of your daughter alone tonight." Her outrage is fake, but Rhys gets the message.
I can't help but snicker, and when Marcus walks past me toward the fridge, I notice a smirk on his face. Seeing him smile causes my stomach to flip.
Lilly and Rhys disappear, and it's only Marcus and me. Unsure what to do, I slide off my seat and walk over to turn on the espresso maker. I flip the switch and am about to grab a mug out of the cabinet when Marcus steps in my way. He opens the door, taking a mug out and handing it to me. My heart halts in its tracks. What is he—
When I don't reach for it, he says, "It's just a mug, Denielle."
He is correct on that fact, however, besides two orgasms, the man has never given me anything voluntarily. The way he enunciates my name contradicts the meaning of his statement, and my insides warm. I don't dare think that the time we spent together has put us on at least friendly terms.
I take the offering from him and turn toward the machine. "Would you like a cup?" If he can extend an olive branch, I can as well.
"Uh, yeah, sure." A thermos appears next to me, and I press my lips together to not show him the smile he doesn't deserve. Not yet.
I spendmy morning highly caffeinated (and jittery) with Oli and Elena. By the time they got up, I was four shots deep in the espresso. I've assured Oli numerous times that I am fine and he doesn't have to come back to LA after their friend's wedding.
"Hearing what happened with Kelly just brought back a lot of memories I had suppressed," I tell him to justify my relapse.
"You don't have to tell Dad, but do you think you should call Dr.—"
"NO!" Poor Elena jumps at my outburst, and I mouth asorryin her direction. I am convinced my therapist reports back to my parents. "How about I call you if it happens again, and you can come babysit me?" I plaster a false smile on my face. While he could technically work from anywhere and has the ability to watch me, I wouldn't call him unless it got badbad. What's gone on the last few weeks has been a cakewalk compared to my childhood.
Needing to hit the road, Oli grudgingly agrees to our new arrangement. We hug goodbye outside, and as their rental car rounds the corner and I turn back toward the house, I catch a glimpse of Marcus standing in the window of Lilly's office.
My heart jumps at the sight, and as soon as our gazes collide, my body turns feverish.
This is ridiculous.
I avert my eyes and speed inside and to my room. I'm not supposed to work, but I could always swing by La Déesse to get a head start on next week.
CHAPTEREIGHTEEN
MARCUS