“Well, for starters, you made a rookie mistake. Why would you tell her you were meeting up with another girl last night?”
“I didn’t think it mattered,” I said. “I didn’t know she thought it was anything more than a hook-up.”
“Even still, it’s not cool man.”
“I’m not allowed to see two women in one night?” I huffed. “As if you don’t do that all the time.”
He made a face. “I don’t do it all the time and I’m offended by the accusation. But still, even if I was going to do it, I would be a lot more subtle about it. Regardless of the nature of your relationship with Stephanie, it’s just plain rude. Think about how you would feel if she had gotten out of your bed, put a sexy dress on, and told you she was going to go meet another guy for a drink. Really man. How wouldyoufeel?”
I paused.
“Well?”
“I would feel cheap.”
“Exactly.”
“Shit.”
“Yeah.”
“I fucked up.”
“Yes you did, my friend. Yes you did.”
“But she messed up too!” I added. I knew I was being a little childish but I didn’t care. I wanted to be at least partially vindicated. “I never said I wanted a relationship; in fact, I have been very clear with her since even before we started hooking up that I don’t do romantic entanglements. I just do sex and friendship, that’s it! She knew that, and yet she’s acting like I led her on.”
He shook his head. “Yeah, unfortunately, even if you’re technically right, you are still probably going to have to apologize.”
“Why?”
“Because you hurt her feelings and if you want things to be less tense, you apologize. It’s as simple as that.”
“But I didn’t do anything wrong. Besides maybe the going out with another girl part, but other than that, I don’t really see why I’m the one to blame here?”
“Look—You have to ask yourself, do you want things to be less awkward between you and Will’s nanny or do you want to be right? Because I’m not sure you can have both.”
I huffed. “But I want both.”
“Sorry. It’s one or the other. Take your pick.”
“I wish Jeremy was here. He’s better at giving advice.”
“No,” Ezra said. “Jeremy just isn’t as honest as I am, so you know he’s not going to tell you anything you don’t want to hear. But you know what, I think it’s time you do hear this. Matt—I love you, but I think you need to get over yourself.”
I laughed. Hard. “I need to get overmyself?” My eyes went wide. “That’s rich coming from you little brother. You walk around like you are God’s greatest gift to mankind. No, you walk around like you are God’s greatest gift to womankind.”
“That’s where you’re wrong,” Ezra said. He put a finger up in the air to demonstrate he was about to teach me something that I probably had no interest in learning. “Do I think I’m great? Absolutely. Where does this confidence come from? I’m not entirely sure, but it’s been working for me so far. But do I think I’m above it all? No. Fucking. Way. Who wants to be above it all, when ‘it all’ is everything good that life has to offer!”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
He sighed. “Let me try to explain better. Sometime after Will’s mother walked out on the two of you—”
“She didn’t walk out on me. We weren’t together.”
“Semantics. The point is, sometime after Iris—”
“Her name was Irene.”