Chapter Fourteen
*Dax*
My fingers grippedPoe’s waist a bit to tight, but I couldn’t loosen them. My processors weren’t able to keep the panic out of my voice or off my face.
Up until she had stopped I had been having the best morning of my entire life. Poe had been touching me, her eyes shining with want and need, her hands exploring my frame without hesitation.
Then she figured out she wasn’t dreaming and her exploration of my frame had ended. Her hands withdrawing from my frame had made it hard for me to breathe. I hadn’t wanted her to stop, to pull away from me and start apologizing like she had been doing something wrong.
Nothing about her touching my frame had been wrong. Her hands moving over my skin had felt right. They had felt perfect and processor frying. When she had climbed on to my lap to resume her exploration I had lost the ability to think. I gave myself over to her hands, the feeling of her weight on top of my frame. My circuits chimed she could have me anyway she wanted.
Then she stopped for the second time.
The thought of Poe’s rejection had sent terror racing along my wires, fear and insecurity pinging across my circuits like bolts of lighting.Why had she stopped?
Words the other cyborgs had used to hurt me filled my brain, a never ending chorus of freak and loser playing on a loop. For all my brilliance, I had never been able to out run the cruel words they had flung my way.
Being close to Dr. Shaw had made me a target for the cyborgs that hated her. I knew I was different. I had gotten the life the other cyborgs would have traded all their circuits for. I had been cared for. Protected. Kept safe from all the abuse and pain.
The Global Allegiance flaunted me to investors and fawned over my design while they were torturing my brothers and sisters without my knowledge. My years after my escape had been filled with trying my best to prove I was sorry. To prove that I was good enough to be part of them. I had crafted new formulas, fixed any damage they sustained, all the while taking their taunts without comment. I spent my days trying to understand them even though they tried to understand me.
Things had started to get better, but it hadn’t been enough to appease the demons lingering in my processors or ease the aching loneliness. I burned with jealousy deep down in my circuits for what Dash, Reaper, and Acer had found. Some cyborgs still didn’t want human females, but I couldn’t understand their logic. Why wouldn’t you want someone to spend your days and nights with? Someone who curled against your frame just because they wanted to be near you, who gazed at you like you were beautiful even if you were green and bald and more metal than man.
I had been Poe that had snuggled up against my frame, her fingers chasing away the ache, sending every demon fleeting with the desire I saw blazing in her eyes.
“Dax,” she murmured as she let go of the hold she had on my cheeks, leaning down to find my ear. “I already do.”
All my doubt and feat vanished with those three words.
“I like the way therealyou tried to suppress a giggle in the car, how much therealyou enjoyed the whipped cream and waffles.” She sighed happily in my ear. “How the realyou found the courage I didn’t have to ask me to kiss you. I like therealyou. I probablymorethan really like therealyou.All I’m asking for is some time. Time to do this right for the both of us.”
My hold eased on her hips. Part of me knew that I was acting irrationality, but the other cyborgs hadn’t acted rational with their females either.
I’d seen a Service Model pet a stuffed blue elephant. I had watched a Military Model accept hugs instead of throw punches. A Prototype Model survive without a chunk of his programming then risk a wipe of his processors simply for a chance to be with his female forever. A hint of a smile threatened to break out on my lips. Guess I now shared something with those cyborgs after all.
I went to tell her I would happily give her all the time she needed but a blaring alarm cut off my reply.
“Shit!” Poe scrambled off me. “Someone is trying to gain access to the house!” Her feet hit the bedroom floor and grabbed my hand, tugging me off the bed. She dug her fingers into the tattered remains of my shirt. “You need to hide, Dax!” She rasped. “I’ll try to distract them so you can escape. Take the car and drive as fast as you can back to headquarters.”
“And leave you to face whatever is coming alone?” I shouted as terror raced up my simulated spine. “No. I won’t. I refuse!”
“Damn stubborn Science Model! We don’t have time to argue,” she begged. “That could be the Global Allegiance! I won’t let them have you!” She yanked me to her, kissing me hard but clumsily “Hide, Dax,please!”
“Intruder alert,” the cabin’s security system barked.
Poe shoved me with all her strength. “Go!”
Both of us froze as hard footsteps pounded against the stairs.