Cyborgs didn’t truly need to breathe. It was a simulated function, designed, according to my research, to put humans more at ease. A cyborg would only go truly breathless when their simulated lungs were experiencing a malfunction of some kind.
It appeared I was causing a small malfunction. A tiny swell of pride unfurled inside my chest. My fingers resumed the path they had started, every part of me completely focused on my mission to map every inch of his beautiful frame. This time when he sucked in a breath, I felt it, his abs contracting under my fingertips.
The sensation made me dizzy. With want. With need. With something I couldn’t put into words, but buzzed like a hive of bees swarming through my veins, and I needed more.
I swung a leg over his thighs and climbed up, settling myself on his lap. My hands were now in the perfect position to explore and I let them roam, trying to tell him with my fingertips what my mouth had struggled to say.
That I wanted him more than my next breath.
That I desperately wanted to believe in forever.
That he was worth whatever price I had to pay.
His eyes fluttered closed and his head fell back against the pillow, exposing the hard lines of his throat, like he was offering it up as a sacrifice.
My hands began to tremble. Every inch of himself he gave over to my touch, trusting me with his frame.
The cyborg I had longed for was under my fingertips, relishing my every touch. I wasn’t a seductress despite my current moment of bravery. I didn’t know who this girl was that had climbed onto his lap, who the hands belonged to that were caressing his frame. Didn’t know whose voice it was in my head that whispered to kiss the hard line of his throat and nuzzle the spot where his neck and shoulder met.
“Dax,” I drew out his name on a long hiss of breath. I shook with crazy thoughts and realizations I didn’t know I felt ready for.
Not yet.
It was too soon. Or not soon enough. Everything was muddled with desire and longing.
“Dax,” I watched as he opened his eyes, fixing them on me. The bright green grounded me and the way he looked at me gave me the reason I needed to make myself slow down. I dropped my head onto his chest, listening to the steady thump of his heart beneath my ear.
He looked at me with his heart shining in his eyes. A heart I couldn’t risk breaking. Dax had spoken of forever, not of a one night stand or two days of endless sex where we screwed each other’s brains out and then said our goodbyes.
Dax, the most brilliant cyborg in existence would never do things half assed. He would offer everything.
His frame.
His mind.
His heart.
His soul.
And I refused to take what I wasn’t sure he knew he was offering. Make no mistake, I wanted it all, but first I wanted dates and time spent getting to know each other. I wanted to learn what made him smile or made him sad or what made him laugh. I wanted to truly know thisDax. Not the image file of him that I had stared at for years. I had skipped an important step. The step of actually falling in love.
The cyborg who I had dreamed of when I was young had been for a lonely, scared little girl. The cyborg I dreamed of now loved whipped cream and waffles and didn’t care that I spilled my feelings after hours of meeting him. He was the cyborg who had carried me to bed, staying by my side the whole night and who was left breathless by my touch. I couldn’t wait to discover what else he had hidden away in those big processors of his. And rushing this wouldn’t be fair to either of us.
Do you always have to be this rational?The horny side of my brain whined.
It’s not rational....it’s falling inlove.Or the beginnings of it.
I pushed myself up and saw worry lines furrowing Dax’s brow. I scooted up his frame looking into his eyes.
“You stopped again,” he said softly then frowned. “Did you come to the conclusion ...” he took a deep breath, “the conclusion that I wasn’t worth you continuing your exploration?” The words came out in a broken whisper.
I cupped his cheeks with force, holding on as tight as I thought I could manage without damaging my hands. “No, Dax! Iwantyou. Don’t ever think I don’t but I don’t want to make this about getting into your pants. I don’t want just your frame. I wantmore.”I pressed a kiss to lips. “I spent years staring at an image file of you and falling for the cyborg I had created in my head. You aren’t that cyborg.Youare therealDax. Let me take the time to get to knowyou,thereal you.”
His hands came up and gripped my waist, his fingers digging into my hips, tight lines forming around his eyes as his gaze darted around the room. “What if you find you don’t like therealme?”