“Yes. More…Noel, more.”
He withdrew and slid in sending exquisite pleasure flooding to every neuron in my body. “More?” He murmured against my neck.
“Yes.” I gripped his shoulders, holding on to him. Wanting to hold on forever, knowing I only had this moment.
He rolled us until I was on top. “Ride me, Harper. Take what you want.”
I rested my hands on his chest. The words, “I want you,” sat on my tongue but I was too afraid to say them. Instead, I rose up and then slid down, the friction of him inside me driving me wild. I let go, let my body take over. I rode him, letting my head fall back, as I reached for the pinnacle of pleasure.
He sat up, his lips sucking a nipple. I felt it in my pussy and when I lowered over him, my orgasm crashed through me.
“Noel!”
“Yes…fuck yes…” He fell back, his hips bucking underneath me as his own orgasm overtook him. We rocked together, hard, fast, until I collapsed on him.
As the shimmer of pleasure dissipated, the ramifications of what just happened hit me. It was déjà vu all over again. I’d got caught up in the emotional yearning and physical need that Noel created in me and afterwards regret swamped me.
"Don't. Don't pull away from me, Harper." Noel's arms tightened around me.
In the past, anger would've propelled me into action and leaving, but instead of anger I felt misery. Tears welled in my eyes. I hated that because I didn't want to look like a weepy woman. I was stronger than that. It had to be hormones getting the best of me.
That reminded me about the baby and how I needed to tell Noel about it. God knew what his reaction would be. I couldn't imagine it would be good, which was another reason to get out of his arms. But he held me close and God dammit it felt good.
"I can't do this anymore, Noel."
"So we won't. Instead of running away, stay here."
I lifted my head to glare at him. “Says the man who couldn't get away fast enough the last times we had sex. The man who disappeared without a word for days."
He had the good graces to look chagrined. "In my defense, I stopped by your house before I left to let you know I was leaving and I even stopped by when I got back, but you were gone both times."
"So it's my fault. Did you forget how to use a phone?"
This one arm still held me to him like a steel trap but his other hand scraped over his face. "Mo was pretty unhappy to be gone. By the time he was settled, I was exhausted." He reached up with his hand gently tugging on a strand of my hair. "I think he missed you. I know I did."
I closed my eyes, steeling myself against his words that made me want to melt into him, believe in him. But I couldn’t. I was beginning to believe that despite the incredible chemistry and even a few tender moments, Noel and I just weren't meant to be.
As much as I cared for him and wanted to be with him, if our future was going to be filled with this sort of tension and animosity, I didn't want it.
"Why are you here?" I felt so tired.
"I told you. To come get you and take you home. Why are you here?"
“I told you, to get answers."
"You’re investigating me? You took the advice of a complete stranger who quite possibly is a member of the cartel, and came down to Mexico to talk to somebody else who's involved in the cartel instead of just asking me." He wasn't yelling, but there was an edge to his tone.
I gave a mirthless laugh. "I did ask you, but clearly your past is off limits. Plus, you vanished. Remember?"
He pulled me closer and kissed my head. Again, I tried to resist the warm feelings it gave me but failed as I settled back against him.
"I'm sorry about that."
"What's the big secret Noel? Is it just you don't want me to know you're still pining for Mo’s mother?"
His head jerked and eyes widened. "What?"
"You heard me. I know you sent Dax down here on some mission. And I know that you want her with you and Mo."