“You can say fuck off with just your eyes. Quite a talent.”
I adorn my face with the picture of indifference before drawling, “you’re in my sun Vasiliev, either sit down or fuck off.”
He quirks an eyebrow, but after a moment does exactly that, leaning against the tree trunk so close to me that his thigh presses against mine. I close my eyes again, trying to locate the calm that I had only minutes ago, but I’m too aware of him. I can feel the heat of his eyes as they travel along my face and down my neck. I shift slightly, crossing my ankles as they stick out in front of me, but nothing relieves the unnerved feeling. He’s waiting for me to crack, I just know it. He doesn’t wait long.
“Is there something I can help you with?” I snap, swinging my eyes to stare over at him. He bends a knee and rests his folded arms atop it while looking in my direction. Jack stays quiet, but I can see the clogs of his mind churning, observing, processing, like I’m under a microscope.
“Are you dangerous?”
What?That wasn’t what I was expecting. He must see the shock on my face because he asks again, slower this time.
“Are. You. Dangerous?”
I’m ready now, quick to react and my temper flies a little. “Why would you ask me that?” I practically shout.
He just shrugs his shoulder and faces forward, like this isn’t the strangest conversation I’m having this week.This week.Isn’t that a depressing thought? He doesn’t look back at me as he speaks. “Nash doesn’t seem to think you are, but I’m not so sure. Peyton low-key loves you. You’ve become her closest friend in a matter of months.”
He looks at me then, his gaze touching every part of me before meeting my eyes. “Something about you doesn’t add up. I don’t know what it is, but I can see it. Fuck, I canfeelit. The others know it too. Peyton may be blind, but we aren’t. So, I’ll ask you one last time. Are you dangerous, Briar?”
“Peyton isn’t in danger with me.”
“That’s not what I asked. I asked ifyouare dangerous.”
I swallow thickly. I meant what I said, Peyton isn’t in danger with me, but she might be by associating with me. It’s utterly selfish to want her around knowing how I could derail her entire existence, but she’s quickly becoming someone I need. Someone I look forward to seeing. If I lost that? I don’t know… I shut my eyes again, just wanting to block out the ugliness of his insinuation, hisaccurateinsinuation. My response is barely above a whisper, but I know that he hears every word I say, and every word I’m not saying.
“I don’t want to be.”
The look he gives me then is strange. Like he doesn’t know what to do with that admission. His eyes are overflowing with turmoil as he continues to stare at me. I look back at him with as much vulnerability as I can muster, letting him see just how much I mean that. Even if he doesn’t know anything about me, and he never will, that this, everything that has and will happen, is not my choice.
In the background I hear the chimes of the bell, signaling that it’s 1pm, but we both ignore it. His eyes flick between both of mine before his expression shudders and he shuts his eyes tight. He gives a curt nod, rising to his feet and leaves without a backwards glance.
Three things occur to me in this moment. The first being how sick I am of seeing the backs of other people, watching them walk away from me like I’m nothing. The second being that no matter how hard I try, this spot will never be a place of peaceful solitude for me again, and Jack has stripped me of that inner calm I desperately needed. The most pressing though, the one that is seeking to devastate me, is that I think my friendship with Peyton is over.
Chapter Nine
Nothing! It’s been week and the only thing I have to show for it is whiney messages, sexting, and shopping store locations. Clarke wants me to call him, like ten minutes ago with an update and I have freaking nothing for him! He’s going to go ballistic. I flop down on my bed, pushing the heal of my palms into my eyes to try push down the urge to scream, but when that doesn’t work, I turn, smothering my face into my pillow and let loose.
I’m torn from my temper tantrum by the ringing of my phone, making me jolt upright, dread settling deep in my stomach. I know exactly who’s calling me, and as much as I would rather hide in my blanket and pretend the world doesn’t exist for a few more hours, I know without a doubt that if I do not answer this call, hell would be a welcomed sanctuary in comparison to what he’d have waiting for me.
Shaking out my trembling hands, I pick up my phone, blowing out a soundless breath and click accept on the call. Mustering the sweetest voice I can manage, the one that both lets him know that I know I’m in trouble and tries to pull on our roots, I say “Hello stranger”.
His chuckle is amused, but his words are direct and to the point. Right, he’s all business and I’m fucked. “What do you have for me, Rosie.”
The thrashing of my heart becomes so loud that I swear he can here it through the phone. He knows I have nothing, and he also knows I can’t be punished on assumptions though. “Nothing of substance, Clarke. It’s been only a week, and the girl’s an airhead. If you could just tell me-”
“You do not get to make demands of me. You know what you need to and that is the Spencer girl is crucial. You, yourself, just acknowledged that she is brainless. How have you managed to alienate her? I placed you in her room for fucks sake.” Clarke’s control slips briefly, something he’s been doing more and more with me lately. As if he were right in front of me, I see the narrowing of his deep brown eyes, the flare in his nostrils, and the way he rubs his fingers roughly over his palms to try contain himself.
I know that I’d see a hint of his white teeth as he licks his canine tooth, looking at me like I’m prey and he’s a predator who’s toying with me. Giving me enough freedom to not feel suffocated, but not enough to feel free. He plays the game to perfection.
“I know, Clarke. I’m not suggesting you tell me everything, but if-”
“Maybe I put you in the field too early, Rosie. Come home. We’ll extend your training.”
The screaming reverberating in my mind becomes so loud that my ears feel like their ringing. My right hand moves to touch my calf, two broken pieces of me seeking solace in each other at the mention of my training. I’m definitely starting to hyperventilate, and the corners of my vision begin whitening out before I’m about to regain some semblance of control.
“That won’t be necessary. The more information I have, the more instrumental I can be to you, Clarke. I want to help, please let me try.”Lie. I never want to be anythingmoreto him and whatever he has planned, but I do need more information. He must think over my request because the line is so silent that I pull the phone away from my ear to make sure he hasn’t just hung up.
“I have intel regarding the Spencer’s foundation. The Spencer’s are traditionalists, and the foundation will be handed down in the family. The Spencer girl is set to inherit it all. I want information on their foundations, charities, what work they do. All of it. You will get that for me.”