He started to say something else but then snapped his mouth shut and forced a smile. “We can spend more time here later. Right now, let’s get you in the bath.”
* * *
Hudson
Bathing Cosima was at once completely horrifying and also a goddamn delight. Horrifying because removing her bandages and seeing her in the clear light of the bathroom instead of the dark of the club or the low lights of when they’d brought her home last night made all of her injuries more obvious.
In addition to the recent wounds and bruises, he could see some of the scars Eric had mentioned. And knew he wouldn’t be able to see even more of them because badly healed broken bones and other abuse only remained under her skin and carved into her mind.
What he could see was enough to make his jaw clench and his stomach roil. After he’d gotten her down for the night, he’d ask Ian to get in bed with her so he could fiddle with his home brewery. That was something he had complete control over and it never failed to calm him, wipe things he had no say over from his mind. Plus at the end of the day they got some damn fine beer out of it he did say so himself.
For now, he’d give his babygirl the best bath she’d ever had.
The tub was a massive custom job—deep and wide with a couple of different levels. It had cost a fortune, but Ryker had a ton of money he didn’t do much with so they could splurge on whims like this. He’d left it to fill while he got Cosy undressed and took off her bandages and her diaper. When his sweet girl was completely bare, he set her in a mesh seat on one of the middle levels of the tub so he could give her a good wash before letting her play.
“Here, let’s listen to some music while Daddy washes you. Do you have any favorite music?”
She shook her head, and he had to wonder how much music she’d even heard lately, if she ever got to make a choice. He’d play her every genre under the sun until she found a favorite, but he could start with things a lot of littles liked and go from there.
“Okay, let’s try some K-Pop.”
The bright, playful sounds bounced off the tile while he soaped her up, washed her gently from her healing feet all the way up to her neck. Too thin, too many scars, too much damage to her pale skin, it made his heart hurt. But when she started to hum to one of the catchy tunes he let relief and joy wash over him.
She was going to be fine now, because she belonged to him. She would never suffer like she had before, and he would spoil her absolutely rotten.
“Time to wash your face, babygirl. Eyes closed.”
She obediently closed her eyes and pinched her mouth shut too, and he chuckled at her scrunched up features. Yep, she was like a little bunny.
“Now your hair,” he told her, pouring baby shampoo into his hand. It smelled nice, would be gentle on her skin, and if any got in her eyes it wouldn’t sting.
Cosima sighed and closed her eyes as he worked the shampoo into her scalp, careful of the bumps he found. Some seemed older, like they’d been there for a while and would always be but there were a few that made her wince when he passed his fingertips over them.
“Shh, Cosy. You’re okay. Daddy will be gentle. Just relax. Does it feel good?”
She nodded, settling back down and letting him cradle her head in his hands, work a conditioner-slick hand down her neck, massaging softly. His little darling sighed, her muscles going slack, and it made him want to dig a moat around their building, put her in a tower. Never let anyone in, and never let her out so he could make sure she’d never be hurt ever again.
But he’d tame those urges because she deserved—needed—to be out in the world, to see all the wonderful things she’d missed, make her own choices about how much of the world she could bear, and be able to sample all of its delights, meet more people who would love her.
Once she was squeaky clean from head to toe, he drained the water, keeping a hot towel draped over her so she wouldn’t get cold.
“Are you ready to get out or do you want more tubby time? We have bubbles and toys if you want to play some before you have to get out for today.”
He knew a lot of beautiful little girls but he wasn’t used to the way her amber eyes going wide with wonder made his heart kick, maybe never would be.
“Can I, Daddy?”
“Yes, babygirl. How do you ask nicely?”
Her cheeks flushed even though he wasn’t chastising her—they would have to be so gentle, so careful with any criticism or punishment. He’d have to make Ian see that. She’d taken more than anyone could imagine and now it seemed like even mild corrections were like a knife to her core. On the plus side, that left so much room for praise and encouragement, and he couldn’t wait to drown her in approval.
“May I have more tubby time with bubbles and toys, Daddy? Please?”
“Of course you may. That was the prettiest asking I’ve ever heard. What a good job you did, Cosy. I’m so proud of you.”
It was his pleasure to press a kiss to her forehead before running the faucet and handing her a plastic bin of toy boats, mermaid dolls, and counting cups to play with.