“Then don’t act like one.”
“I’m not. I just don’t understand how after one time of fucking me you think you have the right to dictate what I do.” Her deep brown eyes met mine and for the first time I realize how tired she looks. There are bags under her eyes, and she looks exhausted, which of course extinguishes the desire to fight with her. Grace is the most important thing in my life next to my sister and her health and safety are all that matters to me.
“Please stop fighting me, Grace. I just want you to be happy and healthy. I need you to eat and rest. Please, just trust me this once.” I keep my tone soft and reach a hand out to her, my fingertips grazing hers. I need her to know I’m here for her, that she can talk to me about anything and that I’ll give her the answers to her questions in time. All I need is for her to trust me. One time. One.
“I did trust you once, and you disappointed me. I’m not happy here.” A frown pulls at her lips. “I don’t want to be in North Woods. I don’t want to be with you. I just want to go back to my normal peaceful life.”
Her confession hurts, but I don’t show an ounce of emotion toward it. She’s still dealing with the shock of me being back in her life and all of this being new. She will come around eventually, she has too, there is no other option for us.
“You’ll grow to be happy and as time goes on, I’ll share with you what I can. But I need to be careful with what I tell you right now, and not because I don’t trust you but because of the impact the information I share with you may have on your safety.”
“Maybe if you would tell me some things then I wouldn’t react the way I do.” Her voice cracks at the end and I swear I feel my heart do the same thing inside my chest. “I mean, I’m-I’m scared, Luke, and even if I wanted to trust you, I can’t really. I feel like I don’t even know you anymore.”
Without thinking I move into her space, wedging myself between her thighs as she sits on the bar stool. Her hands reach out and land against my chest. I nearly come undone at her touch. She fills all the holes inside me, filling me, making me whole again. I hold her face in my hands as if she is a fragile piece of glass.
“I promise, I will tell you everything as soon as I can. My intention was never to scare, or hurt you, and I hope that you see that. I never wanted you to see me as that person, because when I’m with you, I’m not him.”
“But you are him, he’s inside you, a part of you, and pieces of him come out in every single thing you do. I mean you killed a man without even blinking, without even caring. No one who is normal can do that.” Her voice is as soft as a summer breeze moving through the trees.
“Beneath the man you claim to be is another man, one that I’m not sure I’m willing to give myself to anymore.”
Nodding my head, I pull away releasing her, giving her the space her words claim she needs. “You’re right and I’m sorry you had to see that part of me. I’ll do whatever I can to make you comfortable with that side of who I am, but I want you to know I’m still very much the same person that’s always loved you, that’s protected you, even when you didn’t know it. He’s still here, right in front of you. He never left you, Grace, and he never will.”
I hope like hell she believes me, because there isn’t any way I can let her go now. Maybe in the past I could’ve but now, not a chance. I’m obsessed, consumed by her, and my need to love her, own her, and claim her, is all that matters to me.
“Drink the tea before it gets cold, Gracie,” I command her, as we sit in the car outside the building we’re watching. I try not to be too pushy about it, because then she’ll most likely realize something is up, but I really need her to drink the tea that I’ve laced with a little Temazepam, so she’ll be out by the time I have to kill this Marco guy, that Xander needs dead so quickly.
She takes the travel mug out of the cupholder bringing it to her lips to take a tiny sip. Motherfucking-shit. If I’m going to have her asleep when it comes time to murder that fucker, then I’ll need her to drink more than just a measly sip. I mentally kick myself and try not to focus on it. Surely, she’ll drink the tea and go off to sleepy land. No worries, right?