“I don’t care. I’ve always wanted you bare. I’m clean, so you don’t have anything to worry about if that’s what you’re referring to.”
I roll my eyes, as he carefully, and oh so gently cleans me up. I’m going to be sore, there’s no doubt about it. I haven’t had sex since him and though he had prepared me, he fucked me like a wild animal, with a possessive need.
“I was talking about pregnancy, not an STD. A baby seems like a lot to worry about.”
“No. It’s always been the plan. I’ve longed to see you barefoot and pregnant in our home since the day I bought this place. I planned and plotted for two years. My job makes it hard for me to have you but I’m tired of waiting. I’ll protect you from everyone and everything, and I’ll do the same to any children we have.”
I blink, this is too much for me. I’m barely in touch with what’s been happening. The last thing I want with him is a baby, and not because I don’t want children but because there are so many unknowns between us. I don’t know Luke like I used too. The person I thought he was, wasn’t the man I fell in love with, and though my body knows him, and wants him, it doesn’t change anything.
Lust, and love are two very different monsters.
“You do realize that when you plan stuff like that, you usually plan it together. This is not something you can decide for both of us. I can’t do this with you, Luke. I’m not ready.” I move off the bed and pull on my yoga pants finding my panties a ripped mess on the floor. Luke tucks himself back into his jeans, zipping and buttoning himself up.
When he’s done, he grabs me by the shoulders, stopping me with his body from exiting the room. His touch sears through me, fucking with my head again.
“You might not be able to do this right now, but you will do it. You’ll face the fact that you belong to me and that no amount of time can ever change that.”
I shrug out of his hold. Maybe he isn’t ever letting me go, but there’s no way I can subject myself to the life we had lived before. I don’t want to spend my life cooking, cleaning and bearing one child after the other. I want more…need more…and even though part of me still loves Luke, I won’t stay in a place that hurt me.
6
Luke
Grace is exceptionally quiet after our fuck session and though that had been my intention all along, I don’t really like it. I didn’t realize that I had already grown to like her banter, her anger, and all her backtalk. And now that she’s not reacting with any of those things it almost feels like she’s not here at all.
I watch her out of the corner of my eye. She’s merely picking at the dinner I made for us as if she’s completely disinterested. I’m worried about her, and considering talking to her about what just happened between us, since I’m sure that’s what she needs right now but I also need to prepare for the job Xander needs done in a few hours, and since I really have no choice but to bring her with me, I would rather not get in to an argument before we leave.
“I have to go somewhere tonight and since I can’t trust you to not do something stupid, like try and run away while I’m gone, you’ll have to come with me.”
“Come with you to do what?” she asks looking up from her plate.
“We’re just going to sit in a car and watch a building for a while.” I fail to mention the part where I’m waiting for someone to exit said building so I can shoot him in the head, not that it matters anyway, since she’ll be asleep by then. She won’t even know what happened.
“Like a stakeout?”
“Sure, like a stakeout.”
“Is this what you do for work?”
I grin. “You’re awfully curious about what I do for a job, aren’t you?”
She rolls her eyes. “Only because I know for a fact that sitting in a car doing a stakeout is not what makes it so you can afford your own private jet.”
“Don’t worry about what I do for work. Eat your food, drink your water, and relax. We’ll be leaving in a little bit, and I won’t be bringing you anything else to eat if you don’t eat now.”
“Stop treating me like a child.” She shoves the plate of food away from her, her sudden outburst of anger making blood pump straight to my cock. I couldn’t tell you what it is about her anger that turns me on but it’s like gasoline on an already out of control fire.