Mason’s letter makes me want to laugh, cry, and turn around to scratch his eyes out but all I do is write a simple message at the bottom.
“It’s too late.”
I hand it back when I get up and leave.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Mason
“It’s too late.”
I fold the piece of paper and slide it into the back pocket of my jeans. Leo warned me about Lucy’s state of mind, and I can’t blame her for her feelings toward me.
It doesn’t matter if she never feels the same way about me ever again. I’m still determined to get her back and salvage any type of relationship I can have with her.
I race after her and catch her right before she enters her car.
“We need to talk.”
She slides into the front seat of her car and looks up at me with a blank expression. “Get in,” she demands.
I quickly make my way to the passenger side of her Porsche and slide in. The smell of her is instantaneous. I memorized the smell of her hair, skin, her favorite perfume, and most definitely, the smell of her pussy.
My cock strains painfully hard inside my jeans just thinking about the one night I was inside her. I always wanted to be her first everything. Her first kiss, crush, lover, best friend, and now I want to be the only man she wants. I thought the time we spent together recently was going to solidify my intention to be with her and now I understand why she said all she could offer was for her to be my friend.
I already consider her the mother of my child, even though our angel is in heaven. Our baby had a heartbeat and he or she was alive inside my girl. The sonogram picture was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. In my eyes, it is never too late.
Her hand rests on the center console, and I notice she is wearing a little bracelet with a charm of an angel on it. A symbol of our baby that is in heaven.
One of the worse experiences a woman and man can have is a miscarriage or the loss of a child. It’s a pain that takes away a piece of your soul.
“I want you to know that even though I found out about our little angel…”
She sucks in a breath, but I need to get this out because I will not keep my feelings for her inside any longer. I want to show her what she means to me.
“I would have been there for you had I known about the baby, and I want you to know that I’m here for you.”
The hurt expression on her face is killing me inside. I also know she feels like I betrayed her and to be honest, I betrayed her by not fighting for us. I get it.
She wanted me to be there for her, give us a shot at being together, and I fucked up. I failed her. This is all on me. Lucy and the baby paid the price.
“I’m going to tell Aiden everything.” She stiffens but remains silent. “I’m prepared for his hate toward me, but it means I come clean. I want you, Lucy. I want to be with you.”
She shakes her head in denial. “No, you don’t, Mase. Please don’t do this because I told you I lost the baby. I said nothing because you didn’t think we should be together. You made it clear before I even found out I was pregnant. You made your decision about us, and I accepted it. It’s too late now. Please don’t pity me because you feel guilty. You moved on and slept with other people. It hurt, but I learned to accept it because I didn’t want to cause a war between you and my family, or worse, a rift between you and Aiden.”
I grimace when her beautiful eyes turn glassy and my heart breaks at the magnitude of the suffering I have caused her. I feel like the biggest piece of shit, and I know I don’t deserve her, but I want to be the man she needs.
“I told you about the baby because you needed to understand I wasn’t some girl pouting because she gave her virginity to the guy she loved. We have never been a couple. It was fucked up what happened, and I blame myself for not being on birth control and falling pregnant. I blame myself for being naive and wanting something that could never be. You were honest with me before I walked in on you, and even though it sucked, and it wasn’t what I wanted, I realized that is what you wanted. I’m over it. If you want to tell Aiden that is up to you, but don’t do it because of me.”
My finger caresses the back of her hand, and she stiffens but doesn’t pull away. It gives me confidence that she still feels something for me. The time we shared recently means something.
“Don’t say that. I had reasons for letting you go, and it was a mistake. I want you, Lucy.”
“You are not thinking clearly, and it’s most likely guilt you’re feeling. I want to enjoy college life because it is the only sane thing we are allowed to experience, being who we really are. I want to date and maybe find someone who wants to get to know me and have a relationship with me. Maybe fall in love and that person love me back. We can be civil toward one another from now on. I’m moving on and moving past this.”
The air blowing from the vent in her car causes the silky strands of her hair to move away from her beautiful face.
I lean closer and whisper in her ear, my finger still caressing her hand. “We’ve always been more than friends. I’m done trying to hide it. I know you and you know me.”