“What do you mean? I always thought you loved children. You love Addy and Isael so much. I can see it—”
“I do love them!” I laugh. “And I really like children. But children require devotion that I’m not prepared to offer. I’d be happy with many nieces and nephews. Sofia is a superwoman. She manages owning her own business and being the best mom and partner to Bren. And Ileana, well, being a homemaker is her superpower. She was born to be a mother. She always knew she wanted a family to take care of—and lots of kids. But when I think ofmyfuture, I’m up late writing music or playing the dragon—”
“We have yet to discuss your thievery. Don’t think I’ve forgotten, Iggy.” He side-eyes me, trying to sound upset.
“Well, if we do get married, what’s yours will be mine, so I don’t see a problem.” I throw him an impish grin. “But back to the point. I don’t see myself being a caretaker. I see myself making music. I didn’t know it until you, but music is my passion. Not just listening to it, but making it. And I can’t imagine having distractions from that passion, with something as important as children, and being happy. Because if I did have them, I’d be devoted to my children, and I couldn’t be devoted to my playing, not with the level of devotion I intend to give it. It’s what I need.”
He scratches his jaw. “Makes sense.”
“So you see, if you want children someday, I may not actually bethe one, as you put it.”
He brushes hair back from the side of my face, and his hand drops to caress the back of my hand like he does when he’s trying to soothe me. “You’re the one, Lo. I’ve never thought about having children, but I also didn’t think about not having them—if that makes sense. I like your vision for your future, being that committed to your music. I’d like to share it if you’ll let me. Maybe we could even make some tunes together.”
He pulls me to his chest, and I sigh with relief, hopeful he means it and isn’t trying to simply give me what I want. Only time will tell, but he’s worth the wager—weare worth the wager.
“If you’re sure—”
“I’m sure.”
“No children,” I repeat. “Ever.”
He smiles. “Marry me anyway.”
I smile back. “I’ll think about it.”
His eyes bore into mine. “Take all the time you need, love. I’m a patient man.”
I laugh. “That, I know.”
Naked, and flushed against him, he tightens around me and takes me in for a long kiss. When we finally break away to catch our breaths, his forehead is pressed to mine.
“You have to meet my aunt if we’re considering taking that step.”
“I was hoping we could elope,” he says.
I shake my head. “No. My family is small but precious to me.Ifwe get married, I’d like them there. Guess they’d be your family then too.”
Karl smiles. “Yeah. Guess they would be.” The glee on his face at realizing his new family will be bigger than he imagined breaks my heart a little, but in the best way possible.
“Let’s start by introducing you as my boyfriend—let mytíaget used to the idea.”
“Make a decision soon, Iggy,” Karl adds. “I want to take you on the most depraved honeymoon ever. Keep you in my bed without you having to go to work. We have time to make up for. And it’s the perfect time. We can take advantage while the band is on hiatus for Bren’s paternity leave.”
“Soon,” I agree. “Let’s keep this to ourselves for now. One step at a time. Meet her first, and we can go from there.”
“You lead, I follow.”
And somehow, that four-word sentence warms my chest. It feels like a promise he’s making of what our marriage could be. I trace the shape of the jar on his inner bicep with my index finger and smile.
“What’s that thought there? That made you smile like that?” he asks.
I giggle. “I’m not sure I should say.”
“Ifwe get married, I’d like our marriage to be one of good communication. No more keeping things from each other. Don’t hold out on me now, doll.”
“Fine,” I say with a sigh. “I have a confession to make.”
“What’s that?”