I’ve never seen Mia like this. She’s always been the one to see the good in every situation. I know there’s no way of finding a sliver of good in this fucking mess, but my mind still races as it try to think of a way to make it all go away.
Mia’s phone rings and it helps to break us out of stupor.
Instead of answering it privately, she puts it on speaker.
“What do you want?” she hisses, and it sounds wrong coming from Mia.
“How does it feel?” Josie sneers.
Mia tries to say something but a sob cuts her off. She takes a few quick breaths, swallowing hard on the tears. She covers her face with her hand and seeing her fight to not break down brings life to my body. I rush over to her and take the phone out of her hand.
“How does it fucking feel?” Josie screams.
“Josie,” Marcus starts to talk.
She cuts him off, grinding the words out, “I’m not talking to you! I want to know how Mia feels. How does it feel to know that I had Logan inside me, that the guy who taught you how to kiss because he had to, willingly stuck his tongue down my throat?”
“Hurt,” Mia whispers. “I feel hurt, and used, and dirty, and sick to my stomach, and …” Her voice breaks but she pushes through, each word slaying me. “What kind of person pretends to be someone’s friend for four years? How could you do that to me? Paying Conner … you saw how much that hurt me. You need professional help, Josie. You’re insane.”
Josie laughs bitterly. “I’m insane? Princess, you haven’t seen my crazy side yet.”
The line goes dead, leaving us all rooted to the spot.
~
Rhett is standing by the front door, blocking it so Mia can’t leave. She won’t let any of us near her. After the call she stopped crying. Her fists are balled at her side with rage. I don’t know which is worse, watching Mia cry because of something we did, or watching her shut down, blocking us all out.
Jaxson walks closer to her, and she takes a step away from him. She looks like a cornered animal. I shove my hands into my hair wishing there was something I could do to make this disappear.
“Mia,” Jaxson whispers. “What can I say to make this better?”
“Give me one name, Jax,” Mia snaps, clearly hanging on by a thin thread. It looks like she’s caught in a battle between feeling heartbroken and angry.
“Leigh Baxter, Josie Peterson, Paige Sanders, Jennifer Blake, Penny Wade, Jill Adams, Bethany Doss and Simone Lawless.”
Mia looks at Jaxson for the first time, and I’m surprised to see that she’s not about to rip his head off so she can spit down his throat. A tear slips down her cheek, and when she lets Jaxson hold her, I’m shocked.
She cries in my brother’s arms, and I should take comfort in the fact that she’s letting someone near her, but it fucking hurts.
When she pulls away from Jaxson she looks at Rhett, and he immediately says, “I can’t remember their names. I’m sorry, Mia. I fucked up. I was in college, dicking around. Each one of them came on to me. It didn’t matter who they were because it was mutual. I can tell you that I’ve never made a promise or indicated that it was more than just sex.”
Mia nods but she doesn’t step away from Jaxson’s side.
“I can’t say that I’m not disappointed, Rhett. I have no say over what you do and who you sleep with, it just hurts that you’re so shameless about it. Your reckless actions had a direct impact on my life. You got to fuck them, while I got fucked in return.”
Rhett slides down the wall until his ass hits the floor. He buries his head in his hands, clearly shaken by Mia’s words.
“Mia, you know I’m a fucking mess,” Marcus says, looking remorseful. “I was eighteen when I started that list, and we stopped that shit when we were done with college. Like Rhett said, it was mutual. Every single one of those girls knew what they were getting themselves into. I’m sorry that our fucking around had a backlash on you.”
A bitter chuckle bursts over her lips. “Backlash,” she whispers. “Is that what you call it?”
Not sparing Marcus another thought, her eyes swing to Carter.
“Hey, don’t look at me. You know I’ve fucked up most.”
“You’re right, Carter. I would expect something like this from you but the fact that you don’t care, that’s heartless even for you.”
Carter’s face turns to stone and I know this situation is going to go from fucked-up to fucked-sideways-with-a-pineapple, really fast.