Chapter Seventeen
Justice
I watch her swim, loving how her body moves through the water. She looks so free, so happy. Something I don’t think I can make her feel.
Do I have feelings for her? Of course, I do. I’ve known it for a while now, but I also know how to put distance between us. I know how to separate my job from feelings, and that’s what I keep telling myself she is. She’s just a job, a client who got pulled into this fucked up situation. Except that’s a lie, isn’t it? She’s more than that. Sky’s become more than that, and I hate myself for what I feel. I shouldn’t feel things. Emotions should have no place in this for me, yet they are.
Many women walk past me, vying for my attention, but I can’t pull my eyes away from her. What is it with her? I’m, fascinated by her every move and that thought alone scares me.
The thought of someone else touching her or being near her shreds my insides. I want to be the only one who shows her new things and takes her to the brink before pulling her into bliss. I want to take her places and be the reason she smiles, but what cost to her?
She doesn’t realize just how beautiful she is. Sky doesn’t see the men staring at her. She doesn’t see the looks she gets from women who are jealous of her. However, I do.
I watch her climb out of the water and walk toward her chair next to mine. Our eyes lock, and the air is sucked from my lungs, but then she looks away. She sets her towel on the chair before sitting down.
“Can I ask you something?” I ask. Sky looks over at me, a little hesitant, but then nods her head. “What are you most afraid of?”
“That’s a loaded question,” she laughs. “I guess being hurt. It’s hard for me to trust someone outside of the club and you. I know that’s a form of trust, but that isn’t trusting someone with my heart. Does that even make sense?” she asks, narrowing her eyes at me.
“It does. Makes perfect sense.”
“What about you, Justice? What are you afraid of?” Here we go. This is it. The moment I lay it all out there for her.
“In my mind, I’d like to say nothing. In my heart, there’s a lot I’m afraid of. I’m afraid of not being good enough for a real relationship anymore. I’m afraid I will cross lines that shouldn’t be crossed, and I will be lost again. But most of all, I’m afraid of losing you.” Skylar sucks in a breath as I lean in closer to her.
“What?”
“There it is. You wanted the truth, and there it is.”
“I don’t know what to say,” she whispers. I laid it on there on the line for her. I don’t want to lose her. I don’t want to let her go, but do I have a choice?
“If I’m being honest, I feel the same way. I’m afraid of losing you too,” she finally speaks. My heart leaps in my chest at her words. Are we really going to do this? Am I capable of doing this? I can’t see her hurt again. I can’t lose myself and do that, but at the same time, I can’t see myself without her.
“Let’s go inside,” I tell her. She smiles at me before pressing herself closer. Her lips land on mine, and I kiss her back roughly. It’s lust-filled and passionate and nothing like we’ve shared before. Our tongues war for dominance, but in the end, I win. When I pull back, she’s panting, and I love every second of it.
“Was that you asking me or telling me?” I see the sparkle in her eyes, and I can’t imagine not seeing it there.
“Telling you.” We both stand and grab our things before walking back around the hotel and heading to our room. As soon as the door shuts behind us, I’m all over her. I shove her against the door, kissing her while touching her. I caress her body, but then she shoves me back a little. I stand here, taking her and the glint in her eye in. I know what she wants, and I don’t know if I can give it to her.
“You want to control this,” I tell her, seeing how she’s looking at me.
“You help me, Justice. I want to help you too. You don’t always have to be in control,” she tells me as she licks her lips. I don’t know about this. I don’t think I can give up control that easily.
“Do you realize how hard this will be for me?” I ask her. In my head, I know this is going to be one of the hardest things I could ever do. I don’t like giving up control. I don’t like being at someone else’s mercy, and that’s what she’s asking me to do.
“I know.”
“And you still want it?” I ask. She nods her head, slipping her bikini bottoms off before untying the top and letting it fall free. Her need to come to me, submit to me, is strong.
“Okay. For you,” I tell her. She smiles and nods toward my shorts which I slowly slide down my thighs and kick to the side. Of course, my cock is already hard for her. It always is.
“Sit in the chair,” she murmurs seductively. I sit down, waiting to see what she does next. Sky struts with a seductive sway of her hips toward me. Once she’s standing before me, she bends over and leans down, pressing her lips to mine. It’s a struggle to keep my hands to myself.
“If we do this, you have to forgive me.”
“Forgive you for what?” she asks as she stands upright and begins to run her hands over her breasts. My cock jerks in response to watching her.
“For the other night. I truly am sorry, Sky.”
“I’ve already forgiven you for that. You were lost, and now I understand. It’s in the past.” Sky says as she runs her hands down her stomach and between her legs. I groan and shift in my seat as she moves between my thighs.
“Can I try something new for me?” When she hesitates, I stand and move toward her. Wrapping my arms around her waist, I pull her against me.
“You’ve come this far, Skylar. Don’t doubt what you want. This is just as hard for me, but I’ll do it for you.” When her eyes meet mine, I lean in and press a soft kiss to her lips, reassuring her she has my full cooperation.