“Fucking hell.”
I consider calling Nova, to see how she’s doing with all of this but since she hasn’t contacted me, and it seems that, by reading between the lines, she doesn’t want me to contact her, I don’t bother.
Maybe she hasn’t heard the news story yet…
I guess it’s possible, but she probably has. And since she’s convinced that Jeremy is behind all of this, if I’m just a teeny bit selfish then it’s easier for me without her here. Just for a little bit.
Instead, I do the one thing that I know I shouldn’t and I click on the news story to see it for myself. It’s heart-wrenching to continually see my reputation dragged through the mud but it’s like a snowball continually getting bigger no matter what I do. Seeing the picture of me and Nova kissing is a confusing set of emotions. On the one hand, I’m very annoyed that this is public knowledge when it really doesn’t need to be, but on the other, I just want my one mistake – who really doesn’t feel like a mistake – back here by my side.
“This will all be over soon,” I mutter reassuringly to myself. “This will all be over and I can get my life back on track. All I need to do is pick up the tattered pieces of my reputation, get my company running as it once was, and then try and see if Nova still wants to speak to me…”
It feels impossible, but I guess nothing is. I just need to tackle it one moment at a time. The first thing I need to do is take a few deep breaths and try not to lose my mind…
* * *
The talking is louder now, more reporters have joined in, which has me even more prickly. I don’t want to think of myself in terms of angry anymore, because I’m afraid I really will lose my shit. I just can’t stand all these people thinking that it’s okay to treat me li
ke this. Like I’m a caged animal who deserves to be locked in a cage because I ‘did something wrong’.
Mom: Hi. Zane, it’s been a while again. How are you?
I stare at the message from my mom again, wondering what I should do about it. I haven’t replied yet because I don’t know where I’ll even begin, but now I need to. But not through text messages, not even through a voice call. I want to see her face.
I don’t even pause to think about what the time will be in France, I just video call her.
“Zane?” She rubs the sleep from her eyes. “Are you okay, Son?”
“Oh, sorry. Is it really late?”
“Don’t worry, I had my laptop open anyway. I just had a feeling that you’d want me.”
“You knew, huh?” I reply wryly. “Is that because you’ve seen something about me?”
“I haven’t seen anything. Call it mother’s intuition.”
I sigh loudly, thinking about Mom’s warning only a short time ago to keep away from Nova. Mother’s intuition was perfect then, she knew what was going to happen before I did.
“Okay, well it was right. Things aren’t going well…”
“What’s going on?” Mom sits up straighter. “Are you okay?”
I hate this, I know I’m going to hear some variation of ‘I told you so’ but I do need her advice now.
“Not really. I’ve made a big fuck up, Mom. I really have.”
She nods slowly. “Okay, tell me all about it.”
“Well, it starts with the charity client I was telling you about the last time we spoke.”
“The one I warned you about?”
“Yes, the one you warned me about. Well, your warning came to light. You saw it before me. I got in over my head and I fell for her.”
“Oh… hell…”
“Yes, and now, as expected. Her husband is going in on me, trying to ruin my reputation.”
“What has he done?”