‘Yes, yes,’ Evanna was saying in that soft, breathy voice that always soothed anxious patients, ‘your aim is fantastic.’
‘Sorry.’ Logan laughed as he walked over to her and handed her some more kitchen roll. ‘I should have warned you about her new throwing technique. I think she might be a cricketer when she grows up. She’s quite good at bowling food.’
‘I noticed.’ Evanna leaned forward, undid the harness and lifted the little girl out of her high chair. ‘Come on, then, monster. Let’s have a cuddle.’
All smiles, Kirsty wrapped her arms round Evanna’s neck and kissed her on the cheek.
Logan felt an aching sadness rise up inside him.
‘Are you all right?’ Evanna stood up, lifting the child onto her hip. ‘Logan?’
She was watching him with dark, solemn eyes and he pulled himself together. ‘I’m fine.’
‘No, you’re not.’ Her voice was gentle as she sat the toddler down on the floor next to a pile of toys. ‘You were thinking about Catherine. You don’t have to pretend with me, Logan. You spend most of your life putting on a brave face in public, you’re allowed to let it slip when you’re with friends.’
She was so astute. She always saw through to the real emotions. It was what made her such an outstanding nurse. It was why everyone on the island loved her. Evanna cared. Deeply.
Wondering why he always talked to Evanna about things that he never usually talked about, Logan stared at his daughter. ‘It’s just hard not to worry about her. She needs a mother,’ he said gruffly, and Evanna walked over to him and touched his arm.
‘Kirsty is a lucky girl.’ Her voice was husky with emotion. ‘She has an amazing father who adores her. Don’t underestimate that. You’re doing a good job, Logan.’
‘Am I?’ His expression was bleak and for a moment he felt empty inside. ‘I’m not sure that I have the skills to be a mother and a father to a child.’
‘Kirsty has plenty of loving females in her life. She’s surrounded by family. What with Kyla and all the aunts and cousins—your parents—’ Evanna broke off and sighed. ‘I’m sorry. I’m trying to make you feel better. Human instinct. The truth is it’s a vile situation that no one should ever have to find themselves tackling. Life is hideously unfair. Feel free to scream, swear and complain as much as you like. I’m always here, you know that.’
He did know that. Evanna was rock-solid and dependable. Always there when he needed her.
And she had the lightest of touches when it came to awkward situations, Logan thought, watching as she turned away to make them both a sandwich. Other people offered empty platitudes or just ignored the subject altogether because it was just too uncomfortable. Evanna never ignored things. She was happy to listen or to talk, depending on his mood. It was one of the reasons he felt so comfortable with her. There were never any awkward moments with Evanna. ‘People keep telling me that I’ll find someone else. It’s just one of the things that people say to you when someone dies. “You’ll find someone else.” As if people you want to spend a lifetime with are waiting round every corner.’ He saw the sudden stillness in her frame.
‘I suppose they’re
just trying to help. People love you and care about you,’ she mumbled, keeping her back to him. ‘I’m sure that one day you will find someone else, even if it doesn’t feel that way now.’
‘Do you? Do you really believe that?’
Her hesitation was so brief that he wondered if he’d imagined it. ‘Yes. What would you like in your sandwich?’
‘Anything. But love doesn’t happen that often, does it? Look at you, Evanna. You’re beautiful and sweet-natured and you’d make someone an amazing wife, but you’re still single.’
Her head was in the fridge so he could barely hear her reply, but he thought she said, ‘That’s right. I am.’
After what seemed like an age she turned with a bag of salad in her hand. ‘This is soggy and horrible.’ Her voice sounded strange. ‘When did you last shop?’
‘Meg filled the fridge last weekend but I’ve been too busy to do much with it.’
She gave a faint smile of understanding. ‘It’s always the same in the summer, isn’t it? Tourists double the workload and, goodness knows, you work hard enough as it is. I’ll do a quick shop for you later and make a couple of casseroles for your freezer.’ Evanna dropped the salad in the bin and added a carton of tomatoes and a soft, liquid cucumber. ‘This is vile, Logan. Most of the food in your fridge died at least a century ago. You’re going to poison yourself and Kirsty.’
‘She’s OK. She’s still eating the stuff you left in the freezer for her and I’ve lived on take-aways all week,’ he confessed, watching absently as she swiftly stripped his fridge of dubious food and tidied the rest neatly. She was so methodical and efficient. ‘Or else I go down to Meg’s and eat at the café.’
Evanna peered at the date on a packet of ham. ‘Miracles do happen. This is still all right.’
‘It’s so good to have you home. We missed you when you were away,’ he said gruffly, and she turned to look at him, a strange light in her eyes.
There was something about the expression on her sweet face that made him uneasy.
Why did he constantly have a niggling feeling that there was something the matter with her?
Logan shook himself mentally and decided that he was imagining things.