“I love you,” I blurt.
His eyes widen and then he crushes his lips down on mine.
I feel like I could fly.
I feel like—
He rolls us on the bed so that I’m on top of him. His hands roam down my body.
I feel like—
“Gotta throw up!” I yelp and shove away from him.
“Shit,” he mutters but immediately moves into action, jumping off the bed and helping me to the toilet.
After he’s held my hair back and I’ve lost the little bit of toast from earlier, I’m laughing and crying as I hunch over the freshly flushed toilet bowl. “Consider this no reflection on my feelings. I really do love you.”
He wraps one arm around my waist and drops his forehead to the small of my back, hugging me tightly. His deep chuckle echoes around the bathroom.
Eighteen
“And now to complete the tour, here’s the stable,” I say into the camera phone, on Skype with my dad. I’m careful to keep the camera trained on my face rather than putting it somewhere stationary. Halfway through the second trimester, I’m clearly showing. I don’t think Dad’s quite ready for that bombshell yet.
Dad looks skeptical on the other end. This is only the second call we’ve done like this and no matter how many times I assure him that I’m well, healthy and happy, I know he’s worried that Xavier’s right off camera, like, pointing a gun at me to get me to say these things. I think only time will convince him I actually mean what I’m saying.
The stable is much darker than the bright summer day outside but the camera adjusts and I take Dad around the stable. I introduce him to the horses and stop in front of Hot Lips’s stall.
“Now I’m going to groom Hot Lips. She’s pregnant and about to pop. We keep her in here where it’s cool and she’s got plenty of access to food and water.”
“Enough about the horses,” Dad says shortly. He leans forward into the screen and whispers, “Is he around?”
I rub a hand down Hot Lips’s mane and sigh.
“No, Daddy, he’s not, but it wouldn’t make a difference even if he was. I told you, I’m not a captive here. It’s not like that. I’m perfectly safe. I can come and go as I please.” I’m not exactly sure if that’s true, but I think it is. It brings up a good point, though. I should ask Xavier for the car so I can go and visit Hunter’s wife. I think we’ve reached that stage of trust and if we haven’t, well, that’s a big problem I’d rather face now rather than later.
“Dad, I’m happy. Really happy.” I grin, thinking of the string of wonderful days Xavier and I have been sharing lately.
By the middle of the second trimester, the nausea is much better, thank God. Dealing with the urge to throw up was bad enough, but Xavier’s constant paranoia about me not gaining enough weight and obsessing about every morsel of food that did or did not go into my mouth? Yeah, that might have driven me right to the very edge of insanity.
And it’s hard to have much of a libido when you feel like hurling every other second.
But the blessed second trimester!
Something no one ever told me about pregnancy? Well, it’s not like I ever had any pregnant friends or anything, working my way up the corporate ladder in a mostly man’s world—but anyway.
It makes you horny as hell. I’m not even kidding. It hits somewhere around the second month of the second trimester. The morning/all day sickness is finally mostly gone and then boom. All I can think about all the time is getting Xavier naked.
“Oh my God,” Dad whispers. “You’re in love with him.”
I jerk my attention back to the small screen in my palm. He looks stunned and worried but I don’t look away. I just meet his gaze and nod. “I am, Dad, and he’s worth it. I wish you could meet him. He’s a good, honorable man.”
Dad swallows and rakes a hand through his hair that’s graying just at the edges. He’s gotten very tan over the past months and he looks more fit as well. Earlier he told me he does a lot of swimming and his diet consists of fish, much of which he catches himself, and lots of fresh vegetables. “I don’t know what to think, baby. I mean, there’s this man. And… horses?”
I feel my expression soften and I laugh. “I know. None of this is what I could have ever expected for myself either. But I’m happy. Please be happy for me, too, Dad.”
He hesitates, eyes still wary, but finally he nods.
My phone beeps and I see the battery sign flashing in the corner. “I’m about to run out of battery, Dad. Love you and talk to you soon.”