A runner passes by, her breaths heavy and her feet thudding against the pavement.
A couple comes next, holding hands and blissfully happy.
Then a mother with a stroller.
And on and on the people pass by, smiles on their faces, enjoying the beautiful summer day. Yet, here I am, sitting alone, and miserable.
I pull out my phone, staring at the blank screen and take a deep breath.
I need to get out of here.
I need to go somewhere new and unfamiliar, where there aren’t reminders of what my life used to be like before all this.
Nova: Can I crash on your couch?
The reply comes almost instantaneously.
Owen: You’re in the city?
Nova: Not yet but I’m thinking of coming.
Owen: Yeah, sure. You can crash with me. The place is small, but it’s decent.
Owen: I know I didn’t contact you after you told me. I guess I was shocked. But I’m really sorry.
I inhale a breath.
Nova: It’s okay.
Owen: When are you coming?
Nova: As soon as I can.
Owen: Give me the details and I’ll pick you up.
Nova: Okay. Thank you.
Owen: You know I’d do anything for you.
“I know,” I whisper, though he’s not there to hear it.
I open my web browser and search for the quickest flight out. I find one in four hours and I take it. It gives me enough time to pack some clothes and get to the airport.
I tuck my phone away and start the lonely walk back to the apartment.
I look up as I get there and spot Jace’s feet dangling from the fire escape.
I close my eyes.
He’s going to hate me for this.
He should. You’ve done nothing but push him away and now you’re leaving. The final act of betrayal. He’ll never love you after this.
I swallow thickly.
How can he love me, when I don’t even love myself? I have to learn to love myself again. I have to do this.
I step into the lobby of the building in a daze and take the elevator up.