A ragged groan tore free of my throat as I came hard and fast. My knees buckled as the orgasm wrenched through me and I had to lean against the cabin wall to support myself. Hot cum spewed all over the wall and my hand and it felt like it was never going to stop shooting out of my dick. I buried my mouth against my arm to stifle my moans of pleasure as wave after wave of violent bliss tore through me. When it was finally over, my hand and dick were soaked in ropes of cum and I was struggling to catch my breath. I had no idea how much time passed before the cold finally began to register. My feet felt like blocks of ice as I stripped off my T-shirt and wiped off my still half-hard cock and hand and tucked myself back into my jeans. I returned to the cabin reluctantly and went to the small half-bath to clean up as best I could. I told myself to return to the couch and try to get some sleep, but my body had other ideas because, before I knew it, I was in Ethan’s bedroom standing over him. At some point, he’d turned on his stomach in his sleep and the blanket had gotten kicked down enough so it was only covering his lower body from the ass down.
I shook my head as I stared at his back.
There was nothing feminine about him.
Not one goddamn thing.
I reached down to grab the edge of the blanket and pulled it up the length of his back. I didn’t have to let my fingers connect with his skin as I covered him, but I did. And sure enough, energy sparked to life every time my body made even the barest contact with his.
Disbelief washed through me as I settled the blanket over his shoulders.
This can’t be happening.
But I knew it was. And I knew it wasn’t some trick of my imagination because even as I stood there and stared at the look of peace in Ethan’s face as he slept, I felt my dick stirring to life again.
I wanted him.
A man.
I turned away from him even as my body urged me to crawl into bed next to him and wrap myself around him so I could absorb some of that same peace he’d finally managed to find in sleep. I knew I wouldn’t be as lucky because by the time I reached the couch, I was once again hard and I knew it wouldn’t matter if I jacked off again or not.
Because in my gut I knew that as long as I was around Ethan, it would likely become my new normal.
And that just wasn’t going to fucking work for me.
* * *
Two days later and I was as close to losing it as I could possibly get. I’d managed to avoid Ethan for the most part once I’d accepted that no amount of questions or reassurances that I was just trying to help were going to get him to open up to me. So I’d turned him over to Lucy’s care and had only interacted with him when he’d needed help getting to the bathroom. Blessedly, he hadn’t needed me in the shower again since enough of his strength had returned that he could take care of the task himself, not to mention that I’d found a small stool in the laundry room that I’d put in the shower for him so he could sit if he felt weak at all. He did, however, need my help getting back and forth to the bathroom. Luckily, I’d had the sense to give him a pair of my sweat pants which had a drawstring in them so he could keep them on his smaller frame. I’d also loaned him a T-shirt which was too big for him, but to my relief and probably his too, he’d worn it anyway. Only now, along with thoughts of what his chest and back would look like when the bruises disappeared, I was wondering if my shirt would smell like him when he gave it back to me.
I was as close to obsessed as I’d ever been about something ever in my life. So much so that I was hypersensitive to everything around me and instead of actually waiting for danger to seek us out, I kept looking for it instead. Just this very afternoon, I’d nearly taken out the driver of the truck that had ambled down the narrow path leading to the cabin. I’d barely managed to stash my gun at my back after I’d realized the guy was just there to plow the road. The man had waved at me, seemingly unsurprised that the cabin was occupied. Up until that point, I’d been okay with giving Ethan a few more days to recover before we headed to Ronan’s house, but the sight of that driver had me on edge and since neither Ethan nor Lucy would tell me who the cabin belonged to and if they had permission to be there, I’d decided we needed to leave sooner rather than later or risk running into the angry homeowner or worse, the cops.