“I need another one, mom,” I said.
“No, you don’t.”
“We need the money. I wouldn’t do it if I was working too hard already. I just have to make more money since I can't seem to get a raise where I work now.”
“I don’t like this Brenna.” Good, then she was going to hate this part.
“I actually have to live on-site for the role.”
“On-site where?” she asked.
“Don’t worry. I’ve seen the accommodation already. It’s pretty nice. I’ve hired someone to come help you out a couple of times a day.” I didn’t like lying to her but this was a case where she would take the truth far worse than she would take this.
“Where did the money for that come from?”
“They gave me an advance. I explained my situation to them and they were sympathetic.” She didn’t look convinced.
“What is this job anyway?”
“It’s paying me enough to take care of the bills and by the end, we’re probably going to have enough to move out of here and into a place with more than a couple square feet of kitchen,” I said. I was trying to sound upbeat but it wasn’t moving my mother. She felt bad about being sick. She thought that I thought she was a burden but that couldn’t have been further from the truth. Doing this for her was going to be hard but I’d do it again if I had to. I would do it a thousand times. Nothing mattered to me as much as her health and wellbeing.
I knew exactly the conversation we would have if she found out that I was providing surrogacy services for money. She would lose her mind. She wouldn’t understand and worst of all, she would refuse to take the money. I needed to keep her in the dark for this for her own good. I loved her too much to let her stop me. I didn’t need her permission for me to try and save her life. I just hoped that if the truth of what the job was ever did come out, she would understand and not feel guilty.
“I don’t like this Brenna. I don’t want you working yourself sick just for this.” I stood up and kissed her on the cheek before heading to the sink to pour out the coffee I had been unable to drink. Tears stung my eyes but I blinked them back.
“Don’t worry mom. You’re more than worth it. This year is probably going to suck, not going to lie to you but after this, I think we’ll be completely debt-free.” That part wasn’t a lie. I believed that after this year, everything was going to turn around. She would be cancer-free and we would be living in a new, bigger apartment. This whole episode would be behind us and we could live happily ever after.
I took two bags with me and left for work. I figured that I could come back if I ever needed anything else and it wouldn’t look weird if I did. It would probably make my mother worry less to see me around from time to time. Oh, I was not intending to stay the entire nine months away from her. If Charlie had something else in mind, he had another thing coming. I hadn't asked him for much in return in this little arrangement of ours but that was where I drew the line.
Besides, if I carried everything along with me now, I didn’t have to pass by the house to say bye to my mother again, it would hurt too much. Work passed by without me noticing. I was distracted all day. If Jameson was looking for an excuse not to give me a raise today, he would have found it. Nobody knew what I was doing. I hadn't even told Maggie that I had made the agreement and everything was going through. She noticed that I was off when we had lunch together but since I was a liar nowadays, I just told her it was nothing.
If she didn’t believe me, she left it alone instead of probing harder. I left later than usual and went straight to the address that Charlie gave me to his home. Soon, we pulled up in front of a townhouse in Chelsea. My emotions had come full circle and I was numb again. I walked up to the door and rang the bell.
Oh well, here went nothing.
11
Charles
I swung the door open. There she was. I had to see her with my own eyes to make sure that this was all actually coming true.
“Brenna,” I said.
“Were you waiting on the other side of the door for me?” she asked. I ignored that a little bit of snark. I let it slide since there was probably a lot more where that came from. I looked at the couple of bags she had with her.
“Is that all you have?” I asked her.
She crossed her arms and pursed her lips. “I thought you said that you would be buying me maternity clothes. What's the use of bringing everything I own if I won't even be able to fit into it in three months.”
“You know, you could act a little bit more excited to be moving in with me,” I said.
“Well,” she said, “for all I know, this place is a dump. All I have seen is the outside. Are you going to let me in at some point?”
I moved to the side and helped her with her bags smiling behind her back. I knew that I was excited to finally be in the same space as her, but I didn't know dealing with her smart mouth and constant snark would make me this glad.
“I can carry my own stuff you know,” she said.
“Nonsense. You're my guest.” She shot me a tired look. I smiled at her. She wasn't my prisoner. My number one priority having her here was to make sure that she was comfortable. It was also for my peace of mind, considering the baby and her pregnancy, but I was going to enjoy every single second of having her in my sight. She followed me into the living room, looking around.