I hear a long sigh that I think must be Cash. He sounds tired of the pushback that Scott is giving him. Most of what Scott says is true, or at least I thought it would be true.
I thought I knew myself, but it seems that I don’t. When Connie suggested this very arrangement, my response was a hard no. When I was standing in that auction house watching these men pull my life out from under my feet, I felt more hate for them than I’d ever felt for anyone before. But living here, seeing them in quiet private moments, watching how they are together—a close a bonded unit—and feeling Cash’s lips and hands on me has changed how I feel.
Scott thinks I’m buttoned up too tight, but I don’t feel scared or angry about Cash’s desire for his brothers to share me. For some reason that only the universe knows, I feel aroused. My pussy contracts between my legs, drawing upward like it wants to pull them in. My lips tingle, imagining Cash’s kisses, then Cary’s, then Colt’s, and Sawyer’s, and finally Scott’s.
Yes, even Scott floats into my fantasy, his hurt eyes that seem to burn with anger locking on mine as he touches me in my most private of places. All of them are there, with their similarities and differences awakening parts of me that I didn’t know existed.
Connie was right about so much.
But wanting something doesn’t mean we should get it. I want chocolate for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, but I know well enough that eating it that frequently wouldn’t be in my best interests. I might want the Bradfords, but I’m sensible enough to know that tasting them all would be like starting the greatest addiction.
It could feel amazing to be in their arms and know what it feels like to lie with them at night. It could bring me more security than I ever thought would be possible. Five men working all of this land will mean I will never want for anything.
But I’ve never been a money-oriented person, and I’ve also never been adventurous. The furthest I’ve ever ventured out of this town is to the nearest city, and I hated feeling like a fish out of water there.
The world is set up expecting one woman to be with one man and who am I, little old Melanie, to decide that I know better.
“She’ll keep us together,” Cash says in the end. “We know what it’s like when a family breaks apart. I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure it doesn’t happen to us. Now you’re either with me or against me on this one, Scott.”
Footsteps thud noisily, retreating down the hall and then down the stairs. Scott leaves without response.
“He’ll come around,” Colt says to Cash. “He might be the last to get his dick wet, but I’ve seen the way he looks at her like the Big Bad Wolf eyeing up Little Red Riding Hood. He wants her as much as we do. Give him time. He’ll crack soon enough.”
The sound of them all drifting away slowly passes through the gap until I’m left alone, holding my deodorant in hand, staring at the door, and not believing I really heard all that.
They want me. The five Bradford brothers want me to be their woman. Well, four of them for sure, and one in denial, according to Colt.
Five!
I spray deodorant under my arms, not concentrating on my actions, my mind struggling to take it all in.
They say you never hear anything good listening at doors. Well, I didn’t mean to hear Cash’s intentions, and now I’m stuck with this ridiculous knowledge and the herculean task of trying to act normally over dinner.
11
I'm a better liar than I thought. Maybe liar is the wrong word. I'm finding it easier to pretend that I'm none the wiser about the Bradfords' intentions for me. I catch Cash watching me out of the corner of his eye as though he suspects that I overheard them, but I'm bright and breezy, never mentioning a thing. I laugh and joke with them all over dinner, and over the next few days, everything seems fine. Scott is still grumpy, but now I know it's not so much about me being here and more about his general distrust of women, I don't take it personally.
In fact, it's Scott who deals with Little Lady's arrival and Scott who takes me out for my first ride around the farm. His horse is bigger and more powerful, and I spend most of the time looking at its big butt, swishing tail, and Scott's broad back.
I suspect that Cash arranged this, hopeful that I might say something to magically change Scott's mind, but I have no idea what that could be. In my experience, words don't change much. Time and actions prove a whole lot more.