“Have I?” He tilted a skeptical eyebrow. “Or have I only got the chance to restore your good name?”
“Last night that’s what you tried to do.”
“Aye, well, that was last night.” Another heavy sigh escaped him. “I’ve since decided I dinnae want a dutiful bride, who marries me for convention’s sake alone.”
“I promise you I won’t be dutiful.” When her small joke sparked no amusement, she spread her hands in bewilderment. “Brody, a mere couple of hours ago, you proposed to me again.”
“And ye refused me in no uncertain terms.”
Elspeth felt like giving him a good shake. Couldn’t he see that none of that mattered anymore and she was his for the taking? “So this is about pique?”
His mouth turned down. “No. Yes. Maybe.” He rested his large, elegant hand on his horse’s glossy bay withers, and his tone sharpened. “What do ye want, Elspeth? There’s only a few hours of daylight left, and I’d rather no’ be riding across the hills after dark.”
He’d proclaimed he wanted her and despite his irascible temper right now, she believed him. It shouldn’t be this hard to speak up.
“You.” Elspeth fought to steady her quaking voice, recognizing she had a fight ahead to get him to trust her again. “I want you.”
For a moment, she wondered if that was enough. Something bright sparked in his eyes, turned them glowing emerald. Then to her regret, it faded, and he looked as moodily handsome and unhappy as ever. “You need to spell it out, lassie. I thought you wanted me last night, and we all know how my conceit brought me down.”
“I want you, and I’d love to be your wife,” she mumbled.
“What did you say? I didn’t hear you.”
Resentment coiled in her belly, along with the more familiar longing and uncertainty. It made her feel braver. “Now you’re just playing with me.”
“Maybe,” Brody said sourly. “You’ve been playing with me since the day I arrived at Achnasheen.” Anger roughened his voice as he went on. “What in hell did ye mean by kissing me like that, if you didnae mean to have me?”
A huff of incredulous laughter escaped, although she remained a long way from amused. “I can’t believe I’m hearing this! You’re the blasted libertine. Did the country miss toy with the rake’s affections and lead him up the garden path about her intentions?”
Her sarcasm made anger tighten the skin of his face, giving her a sudden glimpse of what he’d look like when he was old. “Well may ye mock. Even I can see the absurdity of it. But nonetheless it’s true. You led me on, Elspeth. You made me think that your feelings were engaged when they weren’t.”
Guilt cracked her defiance and jabbed her like a hundred needles. How she’d hurt him. She’d had no idea.
“They were engaged, Brody,” she admitted, meeting his gaze with an unwavering stare. It became clear that nothing but unconditional surrender would break through the carapace of injured pride—and feelings—he’d built around himself.
“Then why did ye refuse me?”
Before she confessed that, she needed to be sure of him. She almost was, but not quite. “Why did you ask me? Was it just to save my good name?”
Brody ran his hand through his hair again, and she read an unfamiliar defenselessness in his face. “That was part of it.”
She licked her lips. What a fool she’d been to imagine that luring Brody back would be easy. “But not the sole reason?”
The hand on the horse’s withers tightened into a fist. “No, not the sole reason.”
Her confidence rose a fraction. “And did you flirt with me because you were bored?”
“Of course not.” He looked offended. “I flirted with ye because I couldn’t resist you.”
That sounded even more encouraging. Elspeth took a faltering step closer. “And you didn’t kiss me because Marina made me look pretty?”
“You’ve always been pretty. Marina just made it easier for the world to see what was already there.”
“I didn’t think you’d noticed me before.”
He sighed again. “It’s hard to explain, at least without confirming that I’m the careless numskull that ye already think me.”
“Try.”