Dmitry: Well, damn. I didn’t plan on killing anyone this week. I’ll add him to my list. No one gets to touch you without my permission.
Cora stared at the words. He’d said things like that to her before, and she’d taken it as joking. Part of the game. But was it, really? They’d both told each other they weren’t currently dating anyone. And though they’d never put any labels on things, this had always felt oddly exclusive. But tonight she’d gone out with another man, had gotten off to fantasies of him and his best friend, had agreed to more. Suddenly, that felt like a betrayal.
Ren had made her heart pound tonight and her body stir. It was impossible not to be affected by him. The guy was ridiculously good-looking and charming, and somehow he made her feel comfortable around him. Comfortable and . . . sexy. Desirable. But Dmitry made her feel that way, too. And she had a deeper bond with him. One based on more than simple physical attraction.
They’d never seen each other face-to-face, but they’d talked for hours, had forged a friendship—a relationship. He’d become a big part of her life these last few months. But what did that really mean?
He wasn’t real. Not really. He could be anyone. He could be putting on a show. She was doing that in her own way with how Lenore looked. She needed to remind herself of that. She wasn’t supposed to put her life on hold for something that was a game with a stranger. That’s not what this was supposed to be. So why did she feel so goddamned shitty for forgetting about him tonight?
Dmitry: Still there, L?
She scooted up her pillows, trying to shake off the thoughts and the guilt.
Lenore: Yes. Sorry. I’ve got a lot on my mind tonight, I guess.
Dmitry: Want to share with the class?
Her thumbs hovered over her phone screen, considering. She should probably keep this light, playful, stick to what they were good at. But she couldn’t help herself. Game or not. Real or not. She couldn’t lie. She and Dmitry had agreed not to share identifying details. But they’d also agreed to be nothing but honest on everything else.
Lenore: It’s been a long week. I guess I’m starting to wonder what this is.
There was a long pause.
Dmitry: This, meaning us?
Us. It sounded right in so many ways. They were an us. But it was an illusion, a relationship hack. A cheat. She wet her lips, nerves trying to overtake her.
Lenore: Yes. I know we’ve been playing a game.
Dmitry: But it feels like more than that.
She blew out a breath. So he saw it, too.
Lenore: Yes. I know that was never part of the plan.
Dmitry: It wasn’t. Doesn’
t mean it’s not true. I’ve missed you like crazy this week. I realize that’s not normal with this kind of thing.
The words touched her. She’d missed him, too. She’d wanted to talk to him about the attack. She’d wanted to share with him about her new project at FoxRen. She’d ached for that kind of late-night, download-your-day chat. That kind of talk you had with your lover. But of course, she couldn’t have done those things without revealing too much. And he couldn’t have told her about his day. Not really. And therein laid the problem. He’d become the man who knew her most personal secrets but nothing about her life. They were lovers and friends and absolute strangers. And she had no idea what to do with that. She had feelings for a stranger. Dangerously real feelings.
And she’d agreed to go on a date with Ren.
She breathed through the squeezing sensation in her chest.
Lenore: I’ve missed you too.
Dmitry: I wish voice chat was working. I feel like there’s more you want to say. It’s okay, L. Tell me what’s going on.
Her throat felt tight.
Lenore: This is starting to affect real-life things and I’m not sure what to do with that.
Dmitry: Like?
Cora chewed her lip, contemplating, and then typed.
Lenore: I met a guy. Nothing’s happened yet but it feels like something could.