My mouth opened with a nearly inaudible moan, and my pulse sped up when his large hands cupped my breasts as he exposed them.
Do not move. Do not—
“Don’t ever forget who this is for,” he said darkly as his hands slowly tightened. “Don’t ever forget that no matter how much you deny it, you are mine.”
My next breath was soft and broken, and felt like it shook the whole room. I’d known . . . I’d known it was coming, and I’d been stupid to forget. I’d been stupid to let him make me want his touch when he was just waiting to remind me who he really was and why we were here. What I’d been taken from.
I felt dizzy when those thoughts came flooding to my mind, and I realized I’d been right. This lesson was worse than anything I’d endured with the devil so far. Because now I no longer simply hated him . . .
Tears pricked the backs of my eyes, but I held back the choked sob when he forced my underwear down my legs.
“Are you going to say it?” he asked as he gripped my thighs and forced them farther apart. “Are you going to tell me that you hate me?”
My breathing was hoarse. My heart numb. I shook my head against the bed, and whispered, “I hate myself.”
I felt the shock that rippled through his body as if it were my own. “Briar . . .”
A few seconds passed in silence before my underwear was quickly pulled back up, and then his fingers went to the tie at my wrists, all the while I wondered if this was a trick.
“What are you . . .” he began softly. “What are you doing to—goddamn it, Briar!”
I jerked from the sudden roar of his voice and whimpered when my hands were released. Pain pounded up my arms, but I was unable to move them as they lay like dead weights at my sides when he helped me to my back again.
Lucas murmured something incoherent as he pulled my shirt back over my chest, then climbed off the bed to put on his jeans. Not bothering to button them, he took two steps away from the bed but paused and ran a hand through this hair, gripping it tightly. Seconds passed as he faced away from me, indecision rolling off his body. He then let out what sounded like a growl and stormed out of the room.
And I ached, but I wasn’t completely sure from what.
Chapter 18
Day 21 with Blackbird
Lucas
What is this girl doing to me?
She was going to be my ruin. And I couldn’t let that happen—couldn’t let her destroy everything even though destroying her was something I knew I had to do.
Had to . . . and couldn’t.
William had boldly and stupidly shown up at the house not long after the shopper had disappeared into the upstairs of the house with Briar, gloating about what he’d done to my blackbird earlier that morning and asking how the rest of the day had gone.
Not noticing how I’d been seconds away from tearing into him.
Ignoring that he’d broken the rules by teaching and touching what was mine.
Baiting me to see if I’d lash out again . . . but I’d already retaliated when I’d hit him. I’d already done all I was allowed to.
Between the men of this world? Lives were threatened to show power, but like for like was how the game was played.
All threats were taken seriously because the man joking with you today could be the man who decided you were a risk tomorrow . . . and then all bets were off.
Between William and me? Like for like would always be how it was played. Two of the most dominant and untrusting men were unlikely as partners. But keep your enemies closer was the only way of life we knew.
Despite the anger simmering in my veins and the need to turn my earlier threats into actions, I’d forced that calm to cover it the entire time he was there, and I answered his questions in the same bland tone he delivered them. Because I knew why he’d been so reckless to show up again, and I knew it was necessary.
He was testing me.
He wanted to see how I would react to him after most of the day had passed, and I needed to tread carefully.