“So, no, I don’t want it confined to the bedroom, but I want our relationship to be where you can push back when I go too far. But only then. Once we establish complete trust, it will be easier. You’ll know that I won’t want to do anything that isn’t in your best interests. ”
Her brows bunched and she stared intently at him. Her expression was pensive, and he knew she’d absorbed every single one of his words and even now was turning them over and over in her mind. He could see the questions in her eyes.
He smiled. She wanted to argue. To protest. But she tempered the bubbling protest as she continu
ed to study him.
“It takes a very strong woman to submit to a man,” he said as he fingered a strand of her hair. “What attracted me to you was your beauty and your laughter. I’ll never forget the first time I saw you in Italy. You took my breath away. But later, it was your fiercely independent spirit that kept me with you. Even as you submitted, your will remained. Your true self was unaltered. You retained all the qualities I most admired, and yet you offered your submission to me so sweetly it made me ache. ”
“You seem so sure the two can coexist long-term,” she said. “Is that what happened with your other women? Did they lose themselves in the process?”
Her intuitive question caught him off guard. “Partly, yes. It happened in two of my relationships. They were so caught up in pleasing me that they became shells of the women I was first attracted to. They became…what they thought I wanted. What I thought I wanted for that matter. It sounds so contradictory, but what I want is a woman who can please me and be pleased by me, but not lose herself in the process. Someone strong. Someone like you. ”
“I may have misjudged you, Max,” she offered quietly. “All this while I’ve been hurting and aching, and I assumed you weren’t thinking about me at all, that you left me without thought and never looked back. But that’s not true, is it? You’ve been thinking about me—us—quite a lot. ”
“Not a day has passed that I haven’t thought about us. ”
Her eyes softened and became damp pools of blue. She reached up and cupped his cheek and stroked gently. “You have my submission, Max. Without reservation. I want to try. I don’t know if you’re right and I’m the woman you need or that I’ll end up being the woman you want, but I want to be her. I’m willing to try. I’m willing to give us a chance. I’ll make mistakes. I’ve never allowed anyone the kind of control you’re asking for. ”
He smiled and leaned forward to kiss her on the forehead. “I’ve no doubt no one has ever been able to control you. And that’s not what I want to do. I love your free spirit too much. I am the only person I ever want you to submit to and it’s my job to cherish your gift and not crush your spirit but nurture it instead. ”
She smiled back. “I think I can handle that. ”
“Good. Now that we’ve settled that matter, I want to establish a few ground rules. ”
She started to frown but recovered quickly and instead looked inquisitively at him.
“When we are alone, whether in this apartment or elsewhere, you aren’t to wear clothing unless I’ve said otherwise. ”
Her lips parted and he could see her battling over whether to question him.
“I want you accessible to me at all times. If I want to fuck you in the kitchen, I want to be able to just lean you over the table and slide inside your sweet body. ”
Her breathing hiccupped and her eyes went a little hazy.
“I might want you to suck my cock while I eat after I’ve fed you. I prefer for you to be nude when that occurs. ”
Her lips quivered and she twitched in his lap. He almost grinned. She was getting turned on by the images he painted.
“When we’re in the living room, I want to be able to bend you over the arm of the couch and fuck you from behind. Or I might want to sit on the sofa and have you sit on my cock. The point is I want you accessible at all times. I want to be able to look at you whenever I want and touch you. ”
She nodded jerkily but kept silent.
“Tomorrow when we go shopping, I’m going to choose jewelry for you to wear. It will be a sign of my ownership. At no time will you take it off. You will only do so if we’re no longer together. ”
Her eyes widened again. “You mean like a…collar?”
His heart softened at the horror in her voice. “No, dolcezza. A collar would never do for you. It would be demeaning. You would hate it. And me for making you do such a thing. What I have in mind are wrist cuffs. I want them specially designed for you and engraved with my name. ”
“Oh,” she said with a quiet sigh. “I don’t think that would be bad at all. ”
He nudged her chin up with his fingers. “Callie, we need to make something clear. Yes, I expect your submission, however, this isn’t a dictatorship. You have to tell me if at any time you’re uncomfortable with something. The last thing I want is for you to be unhappy. We’ll talk about it and work something out. ”
She smiled and it lit up her entire face.
“When we’re in public, I don’t expect you to assume the role of my submissive. The only thing you will be to others is the woman I adore and cherish above all others. Our private life is exactly that. Private. I don’t need the world to see you submit. I’m the only person who ever needs to see it. ”
He circled her wrist with his fingers and her pulse sped up, racing against his hand.