God, that sucks. I was so looking forward to hot sex.
“You and me both, sister. You’re not the only one who endures heat every month and misses orgasms.” I snorted, snickering when my wolf whined again, letting me know she was not happy either.
None of us were, but at least I knew a few things now.
I thought I might have this ability my Grammy once told me about, at least the stirrings of it, and you know what? I was not okay with that. I had enough to deal with already, and I didn’t want to dream about things that may or may not come true.
Erm, I don’t think you have a choice about this, Renny. It’s not like you can just turn it off.
“Watch me.”
Chapter 8 Caleb
Iwas smiling. Happy. Relaxed.
It was such a foreign feeling when I woke up this morning. I lay in bed for a good hour, unsure of what I was feeling, until it occurred to me that maybe, just maybe, I was getting better.
Snorting because the concept of healing from what I went through never once occurred to me, I was blindsided by this feeling of peace that seemed to fill me.
At first, I wasn’t sure what to do with it, and as I made my bed for the first time in over a year and had a long hot shower, I thought about everything that had happened. The only conclusion I could come to was that my newfound calm and peace was about Ren, and once that occurred to me, I had to admit that part of it had been her open, easy kindness.
She’d shown me more compassion and caring than I’d ever felt. Now that I wasn't constantly on guard and dreading the touch, it was easy to see that what Ren offered was special. She didn’t judge, never lost her temper with me unless I got pissy, and talking had become easier.
No, I wasn’t pouring my heart out to the female because that shit was just weird and unmanly as far as I was concerned, but I liked listening to her and hearing her take on life. For a female who’d been abused, nearly killed, and had the threat of other males harming her, hanging over her head, Ren was extremely easygoing and happy.
Her smile was pure magic, the way she talked to herself was adorable, and the more time I spent with her, the more I wanted to. I liked her, I realized, a smile curving my lips as I shut the water off and grabbed a towel while being careful to stay on the rug and hang my towel up after I dried off.
Getting dressed, I made my way downstairs and pouted over the fact that it was Saturday and Ren wasn’t there. There was no chattering as I stepped into the kitchen and sat down for her delicious breakfast, and no smiles as I brewed coffee and wolfed down a bowl of cereal. I realized that, without Ren, the warmth that filled my home was missing.
“Fuck.” I groaned, leery to admit that a lot of the joy I felt was because of her.
I wondered what she was doing right now, whether she was sleeping in or, more likely, probably bustling around doing a million things at once. The female was a ball of energy, and it made me smile for a minute before I frowned and worry invaded me.
Was she safe out there, all alone in her shitty trailer? I wondered, my happiness fading when I thought of the Sheppard brothers and the threat they pose to Ren. Cursing because it infuriated me that any female in this pack should ever worry about her safety, I slammed my half-finished mug onto the counter and stormed out of the house, my jaw tight.
Growling, I got into my truck and floored it towards town, my temper rising the closer I got to my pack and the Enforcer building where I used to work. Clamping down on thoughts of my old life because I didn’t want to think about giving up something I’d once loved, I braked sharply and hopped out, my body strung tight with fury.
Ren should be safe, always. The female was kindness itself and didn’t deserve to ever worry about whether she was safe. Her safety was up to us. As males, we were supposed to ensure the protection of all females in our pack. Not because I saw females as weaker but the truth was, our males were huge, much stronger, and posed too much of a threat. Ren was strong, she’d proved that last night when she’d run through a fucking storm and saved a little boy, but against four males, she wouldn’t stand a chance.
“Whoa!” Someone yelled when I slammed through the door into the main building, stopping only long enough to look around and take it all in.
The room was an open stretch of carpet, desks, and enough Enforcers that I frowned because I could have sworn Walker was complaining about needing to recruit again. Snarling because all I saw were males slouching around and chatting lazily, I looked up and found Cole coming out of his office.
“Caleb?” he asked, every eye turning my way.
Resisting the urge to turn and leave as sick embarrassment filled me, I shook it off and reminded myself that once, I was here, and I'd led these males. What happened to me and what they thought of me now didn’t matter. I was here to bust heads for Ren, and by God, it was long past due.
“This what Enforcers do now?” I asked my brother, giving Cole a hard look. “Why are they in here relaxing instead of patrolling? In fact, why hasn’t anyone been out near Ren’s place today? It’s Saturday, and she’s home alone. You assholes don’t think the Sheppard brothers are just dying to get to her?”
“Dude, she’s fine. We talked to the Sheppard boys.” Cullen mumbled, looking away when I growled.
“And you think that’s going to work? You think they’re going to listen to your ass when you’re in here shooting the breeze instead of doing your job?” I asked, shaking my head sharply when Cole opened his mouth to argue with me. “I know you’re short-staffed, I get it, but this isn’t what Enforcers do. You’re supposed to be out there, making sure assholes like the Sheppards know they can’t get by you. So get out there because I fucking promise every single one of you, if Ren Sheppard is hurt while you’re sitting on your asses in here, I’ll rip your heads off and make it hurt.”
“Caleb. We’re on a break. Most of us have pulled a double already.” Cole said, smiling as he came closer to clap me on the back in greeting.
“Do I look like I care? We’re shifters, not human males. These assholes can pull triple shifts without tiring, and they have in the past. You forget I was one of you, so I know.” I told them all, scowling when Halloran rose as if he was about to come closer.
I didn’t want anyone near me and would prefer not to be here, but as Ren said the other day, it didn’t help me to sit at home and ignore life. These males were my friends a long time ago before my life fell apart. I respected them, but that didn’t mean I wouldn’t kill any one of them if Ren got hurt because they were slacking.