“Ford …”
“I know.” I raise both hands. “Just saying what’s on my mind.”
“And if you’re right and he’s curious?”
That’s the part I’m unsure of. If Orson asked me to suck his cock, I’m not so sure I’d say no. It’s been a long time since I did the straight-boy thing, and never with anyone I’ve actually liked. Mostly, it was closeted guys in high school and a few I’ve met out wanting their first—so they say—taste of dick. Those times I was only too happy to help out because I got what I wanted out of the arrangement: an orgasm.
With Orson … I’m scared it wouldn’t be so straightforward.
“If he’s curious,” I finally answer. “I’d show him what he was missing out on.”
Barney doesn’t look convinced. Apparently, he’s learned to read me better than I thought. “And you won’t get hurt?”
“I never said that, but I figure the tradeoff of getting to see him naked would be worth it.”
“Maybe, but … look, I know what it’s like to be in love with someone and feel like they’d never love you back.” He and Leif were both head over heels for each other for at least a year before they figured themselves out.
I chuckle. “I appreciate the concern, but no one said anything about love.”
“Maybe not yet.” His blue eyes get rounder. “But it’s sneaky shit. You don’t notice it coming, andwham, you’re down for the count.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” Not that I need to. A crush is one thing; love is a whole other ball game that I have no interest in playing with someone so set on holding on to their straightness.
“And Molly?” Barney asks.
I sigh at the guy’s name. “Cute, sweet, but too young for me.”
“He’s twenty-six now …”
“And I’m forty-two. Way too old to be babysitting.”
“Fair enough.”
Our food is brought out, thankfully putting an end to that conversation. Molly has been flirting with me for years now, and while I can acknowledge that he’s attractive and I could probably go there, he’s too inexperienced at life for my tastes. And while the age gap between us isn’t a big deal for some people, it’s too much for me.
Besides, how am I supposed to be interested in someone cute and young when I have a man a few years older than me, with quiet confidence, a quick tongue, and what looks like a sinful body hidden beneath his clothes.
Maybe Barney was right to be worried.
I may not be as in control here as I’d like to think …
7
Orson
“So what else is onyour list?” I ask Ford, phone cradled between my shoulder and ear.
“List?”
“Yeah, you said you were adding reality TV to your list of things we could do together.”
“Ohh …thatlist.”
I smother a chuckle. “There’s no list, is there?”
“No, there is! It’s, uh, got things. A whole load of things. Things you’ll have to be extra nice to find out about.”
“I swear every third sentence out of your mouth is innuendo.”