It would make me think of when Slick did it and what happened after. I’d like to avoid the awkward conversation, having to explain my erection. That’s a huge no thank you for me.
“Last one,” he says with a wide smile as he twists off the cap to the beer and takes a long swig.
He drops down in the recliner across from me like he’s had the hardest day of work. I don’t think the man realizes how lucky he is that he can drive a vehicle or get on his bike any time he likes. I regret taking shit like that for granted every time Alan picks me up to transport me to one of my appointments.
“Am I already boring you?” I mutter when he pulls out his phone.
“I’m ordering a pizza. You have no food in the fridge, asshole.”
I shrug, not willing to turn down pizza but also not feeling like making excuses as to why I haven’t bothered to go to the grocery store.
I’m used to being stared at in public, but people are doing it now for a whole other reason. Plus, I don’t have the damn energy to hobble around the damn store, and I’ll be fucking damned if I climb on one of those damn electric carts. I’d feel like an asshole using one if there was another person that needed it and it wasn’t available.
“I’ll have groceries delivered,” I tell him. “Any requests?”
“More beer.” He turns his up and drains it. “And maybe a couple of rotisserie chickens.”
I scrunch my nose at him.
“I’m not here to fucking cook and clean for you, asshole.”
I smile at my friend.
“And I sure as fuck have no plans to do whatever Slick was doing to keep your spirits up.”
My smile fades away. I can tell he’s grasping at straws. There isn’t one part of me that thinks that Slick would’ve opened her mouth about what happened in this house.
“So I still have to take a hired car to PT and counseling?”
“That’s not what I’m talking about and you know it.”
I keep a straight face as I look back down at my phone and continue to add things to the grocery cart on the app.
“You know she asked Kincaid to stay in Farmington.”
The news doesn’t surprise me. I’m sure the woman was sick and damned tired of being around me all the time, but it doesn’t make it sting any less.
“How did you fuck up?”
“What makes you think I fucked up?” I ask, my eyes still downcast on my phone.
I purposely add raw chicken instead of a cooked one out of pettiness.
“I could tell something was off with her, but she told me it was personal and to mind my own business.”
“Maybe you should continue to do that,” I mutter.
“Yeah. Just as I thought.”
“What’s that?”
I look up at the man, knowing he’s not going to leave it alone.
“You fucked her.”
I do my best to keep a straight face and continue to look at him.
“I fucking knew it,” he says, his smile wide as he drops his phone to his lap and leans forward like I’m going to fucking gossip to him about any of it.
“Did you order the pizza?”
“I fucking took care of it, now spill.”
“Spill what?”
“The details.”
“About what?”
“What happened between you and Slick, jackass? Quit fucking playing stupid.”
I drop my eyes back down to my phone, getting chunky salsa to go with the tortilla chips already in the cart to be even more petty because he fucking hates it.
“Nothing happened,” I lie, something I’ve spent days trying to convince myself.
I’m not insane. I can acknowledge the physical stuff that happened. It’s the emotional side I can’t accept. Doing so would also admit the mistake I made in calling it off, and I need to accept it’s over rather than stew about things that are already done.
Her not returning is her answer, her own solution to the problem we created.
I don’t see Slick being petty and avoiding me because we had some incredible sex together. She’s a fucking professional at work, always.
“I’m not going to drop it,” Ugly warns.
“Then you’ll be carrying on a conversation with yourself.”
I feel his eyes on me the entire time I’m working on the grocery order, and I ignore him the entire time.
“Do you love her?” he asks when I put my phone down after completing the order.
“Who?”
He shakes his head at me. “Playing stupid doesn’t suit you very well, Aro.”
“Slick is a teammate and nothing else.”
As I say the words, I’m also praying that doing so will manifest it into reality. Because wanting something I could never have is only setting us all up for disaster.
Chapter 29
Slick
I’ve heard distance makes the heart grow fonder all my life, but I don’t find the sentiment true at all.
With Aro three hours away in Albuquerque, I’ve spent the last couple of weeks accepting my reality.