I wish I could tell him it doesn’t need to be this way. That we could’ve had something real, that we were both in a shitty situation but could’ve made the best of it if it wasn’t for the anger he can’t control. He doesn’t have to force me. He doesn’t have to humiliate me this way.
It only occurs to me while he’s fucking my face that he doesn’t care. He wants to hurt me. He won’t be satisfied until I’m bleeding and begging him to stop. A strangled cry tears itself out of me at the thought, one that’s muffled thanks to the dick working its way in and out of my mouth. The sound makes him groan and causes him to twist my hair around his fist and tug so I whimper again.
“Mm, that’s right. You know just what I like.” He sighs when I do. “So happy to please your husband. So committed to my happiness and satisfaction. Maybe you deserve to wear these bracelets, after all. Maybe I ought to give you a pearl necklace to go with them.”
His stare is hard, cold, and I find myself craving the warmth I saw in them before everything fell into a million pieces. “Wouldn’t you like that? A pearl necklace? My cum running down your chest like the slut you are?” He thrusts harder, so hard his balls slap against my chin, and my nose aches from banging against his base. His breathing quickens, his pace growing more frantic.
That’s not even the worst part, not even close. I’m wet and getting wetter with every slap of his balls. With every filthy word, every snarl, every grunt. He’s treating me like trash, and all it’s doing is hardening my nipples and making me crave him more. It shouldn’t, but it does, and I have no idea how to feel about it.
I want him—need him—to touch me, to make the ache go away. Because I’m aching inside. Aching between my legs, where my clit throbs. It’s almost painful—and rubbing my thighs together doesn’t do anything but turn my helpless gagging into frustrated groaning because that isn’t enough. Only his touch will do, and wanting his touch right now while he’s using me, is sick and twisted.
A tear rolls down my cheek, and for the first time it’s like he’s seeing it. He chuckles darkly. “Poor little wife,” he growls with a vicious pull of my hair that sends a delicious tingle through my scalp and down my spine. He has no idea what this is doing to me.
He calls me a slut, and maybe I am because I can’t pretend I wouldn’t come if he so much as flicked a finger over my swollen bundle of nerves. I don’t understand the desire, but the degradation turns me on, even though I know it shouldn’t, even though I know he doesn’t truly care about me.
How could I be turned on by a man who only wants to use me?It wasn’t always like this.
“You ready for my cum?” he asks in a tight whisper interrupting my thoughts. I’m almost elated but also dissatisfied for it to end so soon. All I can do is look up at him through my teary eyes. His gaze darkens, and his hold on my hair becomes painful; my scalp burns where he holds me, and a growl escapes his lips. “Don’t you dare waste a drop, you lying slut,” he warns.
“Fucking Christ. Here… it… is…” It’s not another second before the taste of him floods my tongue and coats the inside of my mouth. There’s so much I’m forced to swallow or choke.
It’s the relief of him letting go of my wrists that really matters. As soon as he does, I feel as though I could weep with gratitude, but I won’t. Instead, I swallow what’s in my mouth once he’s withdrawn, not saying a word even when he unties me and removes the bracelets. I guess I don’t get to keep them after all. Not that it matters right now when I have red welts to remind me of them.
“You did good. Now clean yourself up,” he orders, disdain dripping from his voice. I look up at him and almost shrink back when he raises his hand. I’m afraid of him for more than one reason, but I’ve never worried he would hit me, so why do I now?
Something close to anger flickers in his eyes for one moment, but before I can fully register it, it’s gone.
“Don’t shrink away from me. I’ve never hit you, and I won’t. I might be a monster, but I don’t get off on abusing women.”
“What do you call what you just did?” I snap, the words escaping before I can stop them.
A wide grin falls onto his lips. “Proof. You could’ve stopped me. You could’ve told me no, but you didn’t. You didn’t want to. Deep down, we both know you wanted my cock in your mouth. The only shame is that it wasn’t in your pussy. Cum is such a waste if it’s not being used to offer me an heir.” His thumb comes out of nowhere and caresses my bottom lip. “You missed some.” It’s the first time since before the wedding that he’s touched me in a gentle manner. It infuriates me how he can go from burning hot with anger to calm and collected the next instant.
I can’t believe the words that leave my mouth next. “I hate you!”
“Good, it’ll be better if we keep things that way. Wouldn’t want the truth to come out now, would we?” My hand balls up into a fist, but I hold myself back. As bad as I want to lash out, I don’t really want to hurt him.
At least he leaves the room quickly after that so I can go to the bathroom and run cold water over my wrists, weeping silently while I do.
I had a feeling I was making a deal with the devil back in Italy, but now I know for sure.
8
ENZO
“If you don’t stop jiggling your leg around, no one will ever believe you aren’t nervous.” I place a hand on Alicia’s knee. “Please. Stop. It’s driving me insane.”
“I’m insane for thinking I’ll be able to get away with this.”
“Would you relax already?” Nerves are one thing, but this reaction is bordering on morbid. “You’re acting like we’re talking our way out of a murder rap, for fuck’s sake. We’re trying to keep you in school. Not exactly death penalty-level business.”
She rolls her eyes but stops with the leg, so I’ll take it as a victory. “What are you going to say?”
“Don’t worry about it. I told you I have this under control.” I slide her a look that makes her recoil slightly. “And as you know, I don’t appreciate being questioned. So sit back and let me take care of things.”
I add a smile and continue when she doesn’t respond. “After all, I’m your husband. It’s my job to take care of things.” Someone should tell her she has a terrible poker face. I can practically see every thought going through her head, none of which are particularly complimentary toward me. Still, she bites back whatever sarcastic comment she would love nothing more than to let fly. The girl knows better than to test me, even in public.
“I just hope they don’t put up too much of a fight. We’re already not meeting with my usual advisor. At least he and I have an established relationship. I’ve never worked with this other person before.” She cranes her neck to look through the open door into the bustling main office. But then she catches a glimpse of the grimace on my face at the mention of her having a relationship with another man. Her spine stiffens, and she lets out a shaky breath. “Not like that, Enzo. I just mean he’s been the person to manage my accounts, provide guidance, that sort of thing.”