“You lasted a day,” I reply. “But then Marly came with the boys, and we all had fun.”
“Too much fun.” Marly casts a semi-disgusted look at Bell’s stomach.
Bell’s grin overtakes her whole face. “Yes, it was a grand time,” she purrs, rubbing her belly. She’s six months along and glowing.
“Do you think if a pregnant woman landed on someone, they could die, David?” Ted suddenly asks.
“A penny dropped from enough height could kill someone,” David answers. “I wrote about it inFluffy No More, remember?”
“Oh, right, the kid who dropped the dime off the Empire State Building on a dare and it struck the Broadway producer in the eye and caused an aneurysm. Everyone thought it was his lover, but it turned out to be an accident. But during the investigation, it was revealed that the lover was a florist running a cocaine smuggling outfit by delivering cocaine in those little plant food packages with the bouquets. That was so clever of you, David,” Ted coos.
David shrugs his shoulders sheepishly.
“I loved that book,” Bell says. “I read it while I was laid up in bed with Max. It was the perfect company.”
Marly covers her face. “Don’t look at me. You know I don’t read.”
“It’s all right.” Ted pats her on the arm. “You make sweaters for Fluffy, and that’s what counts.”
“Mommy! Look at the snake I found! It’s so long!” Six-year-old Max comes running toward us. Fluffy growls. Ted shrieks. Or maybe that was Marly.
I intercept the tyke and swing him up in the air. “All right, tiger. Let’s put the snake back in the garden where you found him.”
“Daddy, I helped.” A muddy four-year-old beams up at me. Con places a sticky, dirty hand on my knee.
“You did a good job.” I walk the two boys out to the garden and supervise Max reluctantly releasing his prize into the wild.
“I would’ve kept good care of it,” he insisted.
“I know, son, but the snake might have a family. You wouldn’t want someone to take you out of our garden and away from your family, right?”
Max blinks. That thought hadn’t occurred to him before. “Right,” he agrees. “Is Mommy having her baby today?”
“Not today.”
“Why’s it taking so long?” Con whines. “I’m tired of being youngest.”
“In a few months.” Bell strokes a hand over Con’s small head. “Before your next birthday.”
“I’m going to take these hoodlums inside and get them bathed.” I swing Con up in my arms.
“We’ll clean up out here,” my sister says. “But you, Bell, you sit there and supervise.”
The boys have a noisy and messy cleaning session, leaving me soaked from my pecs to my thighs. But I wrestle them into their night clothes and tuck them into their beds. Marly pops in to give the two a kiss goodnight, David and Ted say their goodbyes, and then it’s just Bell and me in our now quiet house.
She eyes my bedraggled condition and runs her tongue along her lower lip. “You need some help out of those wet clothes?”
“Are you propositioning me, Mrs. Knight?”
“Yes,” she replies baldly.
I let out a low chuckle and sweep my wife into my arms. “Take it easy on me,” I say. “I’ve never done this before.”
“How’d I get in this condition then?” She pats her stomach.
“Immaculate conception.”
“Three times?”