No, she thought in panic, as she contemplated the possibility.No, not yet. I cannot let him go yet.
Her heart flipped over in her chest. They had already tried to stay away from one another. It never worked. They were drawn to each other like moths towards a candle’s flame. And besides, if she must end up with Mr. Beaumont, why shouldn’t she grasp whatever little happiness she could have with him now?
Because it is dangerous. Because you may be discovered. Because the more time you spend with him, shaking with delight in his arms, the harder it will be when the time arrives to leave him forever.
“Milady,” cried Reverend Basingstoke, beaming at them. “Jude. I am so very glad you could both make rehearsal today!” He paused. “We are behind schedule because you both couldn’t make it the other day. Would you mind terribly if we go through the play twice today to make up for it?”
Evelina smiled at the vicar. “As long as we can be finished by two, Reverend. I have an appointment with the modiste at that time. Would that be acceptable?”
“More than acceptable, milady,” said the vicar. “We can work through luncheon if needed…”
There was a collective groan from the cast. The vicar frowned.
“We must do what is needed, people,” he said, waving a dismissive hand in the air. “You all want the show to be brilliant, do you not?”
They nodded reluctantly, grumbling to each other. Evelina felt a bit bad. The cast were all taking time out of their regular lives to do this play, and they had other responsibilities. And they needed to eat. But she consoled herself that it wasn’t her fault that she and Jude had missed the last rehearsal. She was doing her best to make up for it, after all.
And she really needed to get to the modiste appointment. If she missed it, the gown the dressmaker was making for her for the Christmas Eve ball wouldn’t be ready in time. It was the first fitting, and it was important.
The vicar clapped his hands. “Let us get started as quickly as possible! Please, everyone, take their places.” He paused, staring at them with sharp eyes. “I expect by the end of today that everyone can toss their scripts away. At the next rehearsal, we will not be relying upon them.”
“But what if we say our lines wrong?” piped up Enid, one of the village girls who was playing an ugly stepsister. The girl looked worried.
“I will prompt you myself,” said the Reverend, smiling kindly at the girl. “Do not worry, Enid! You will do splendidly! Now, let us begin. There is no time to waste.”
The cast dispersed, heading towards the stage, to either take their places upon it or wait in the wings for their first cue. Evelina tried not to look at Jude, pushing away her worrisome thoughts. They had work to do, as the vicar said. And she wanted this play to be brilliant, too. Besides, that it was the only time she and Jude could spend together for a long period of time without raising eyebrows.
She felt a pang of sorrow. This precious time together was destined to end, just like their affair. The pantomime would run its course, the cast disband, until next year. Everything was going to end. The sand was running through the hourglass. Her real life was waiting in the wings. She could barely endure the thought of it.
***
Jude stood outside the modiste shop near the village square, waiting for Evelina to emerge. She had rushed to her appointment with the dressmaker after pantomime rehearsal had finally finished, looking harried, asking him to wait for her outside the shop. She told him she was intending to purchase some items after her fitting and needed him to carry the boxes to the carriage.
He sighed wearily, gazing around the village square. His stomach grumbled loudly. The rehearsal had been so long and they had indeed missed luncheon, just as the vicar had warned them. He was glad now that Sally had brought him that sandwich to eat this morning, for he would have nothing in his stomach otherwise.
He frowned. He didn’t want to think about Sally and their altercation this morning. It was still troubling him and he didn’t know what to do to fix the situation. He could apologise, of course, and try to charm her into liking him again. But that was fraught with danger, because he couldn’t be sure that the maid wouldn’t believe he was encouraging her interest in him again. It was such a fine line, and he wasn’t sure how to manage it.
What was he going to do?
His frown deepened. Sally could cause trouble. She was already suspicious about him and Evelina. Common sense told him he should try to pacify the maid. He didn’t want to make an enemy of her, because then he couldn’t control what she might do. And he needed to protect Evelina.
Suddenly, he saw Evelina through the shop window. She had walked out from another part of the store into clear sight. The dressmaker was fussing over her, pinning something on the gown she was wearing.
He gasped, unable to look away. The gown was not quite finished—the sleeves were not attached, nor was it hemmed. But already she looked astonishingly beautiful in it. It was cream silk and lace, stitched with tiny pearls along the bodice, with a flowing train.
A gown fit for a princess--or a duke’s daughter.
His heart shifted. She had told him as they walked to the shop that the gown was for the Christmas Eve ball that was to be held at Bosworth Manor. He just hadn’t realised how magnificent the gown was going to be, nor how gorgeous she would look within it.
His heart lurched with bittersweet sorrow. She was so beautiful, but so beyond him. He was struck by how far above him she actually was. When they were alone together, or they were rehearsing the play, he sometimes forgot about the vast bridge between their stations in life. He could pretend that she was just a regular girl, even if she was the most beautiful he had ever encountered in his life.
But as he kept gazing at her, he could no longer pretend. He wasn’t fit to touch the hem of that exquisite gown she was wearing. He was filled with a sense of his own inadequacy. He should have stopped this before it had gone this far. He realised he was treading through very deep waters. So deep that he thought he might go under at any moment.
“You need to move away from the door.” The masculine voice was imperious.
Jude spun around. Evelina’s fiancé was standing there, gazing at him impatiently. Behind him stood the Duke and Evelina’s brother, who were staring at him as well. What were they doing here?
But then he saw the horses tethered near to the shop. He had been so lost in contemplation of Evelina that he hadn’t even heard them approaching. The gentlemen must have decided to ride into the village together and meet Evelina here.