She feared finding a partner for her leopard meant permanently separating herself from Gedeon. She didn’t want a man for herself. She wanted Gedeon—and yet she knew she couldn’t have him. He was very careful to keep his very active sex life away from her, but she had an acute sense of smell, and as many times as he showered, he couldn’t wash the stench from him. She smelled the other women and the sex whether he showered once or ten times.
“I appreciate that he’s careful to keep that side of his life away from me. He really tries. It isn’t his fault that I’ve fallen so hard for him. He shares every other part of his life with me and seems to prefer my company the way I prefer his. It’s such a tragedy that he needs so many women to keep him satisfied. I don’t understand it, but he’s very honest about it.”
She turned over onto her belly and pressed her hot face into the pillow. “At least we never ruined our relationship by having sex. He doesn’t know I think about him day and night, or that it’s him I want to have sex with. I’ve managed to keep my cravings under control, but now that you’re showing yourself, that could be difficult.”
There was a faint stirring in her mind. A slight pushing against the inside of her body, as if something alive stretched. The terrible burning was already slowly subsiding, but now, for the first time, she could feel the other’s presence. It was a very strange feeling and she slowly sat up, clutching the pillow to her stomach while she took stock of her body, exploring the differences.
“I can feel that you’re here with me. I don’t feel alone anymore,” she murmured softly, in wonder. The feeling was miraculous. The bonding instantaneous. She found herself smiling, knowing the little female was doing the exact same thing—trying to discover all she could about her human.
The realization of actually having a leopard of her own began to take hold and joy burst through her. Real. Euphoric. She shared with the entity inside of her. “All of my life I’ve been alone, apart from everyone else, until Gedeon. And even he has had to hold a part of himself away from me. I’ve had to hold parts of me away from him.”
Tears welled up, burned behind her eyes. “But I have you. I’ll always have you. No one can take you from me. Even when I lose him, and I will, I’ll have you.”
She could feel the other moving in her mind, reaching to try to communicate. Meiling had been using telepathic communication with leopards from the time she was very young, but this was the first time she had ever tried with a newly awakened leopard. The images she was getting were mixed and didn’t make sense. The little leopard was clearly overwhelmed and struggling to understand what was happening to her. Like Meiling, she was overjoyed to discover her partner, but she didn’t yet know what was expected of her.
“We’ll find our way together,” Meiling soothed. “You never have to worry. We can figure it out. We’ve got time. Do you have a name? Something you want to be called? We can start there. I’m Meiling.”
She sent the images to the leopard as simply as she could make them. The leopard had been with her, waking on and off for short periods of time, before showing herself as the heat cycle took hold. Most likely she had learned a few things about Meiling. Maybe even about Gedeon and his leopard.
I am Whisper.
Meiling was elated she understood. The name Whisper wasn’t easy to understand in images. “Whisper, have you been through this before? Rising to be with your mate? Is this your first life cycle?” Meiling certainly didn’t remember having been through it before. She had tried to find dreams of a past life with someone, but she hadn’t caught so much as a glimpse of anyone. She had decided, because she believed she had no leopard, that she had never had one.
No memory.
Meiling’s heart accelerated. If it was her first cycle, was there a way the shifters in San Antonio had known? She had thought a lot about the way Fyodor and Timur had brought their unmated men to the bakery to meet her in the hopes that she might like one of them. She’d been a little outraged at the idea that they would assume she would be desperate to be paired with a man. It took a few weeks before she realized the men were the ones desperate to find a mate.
She calmed violent leopards. Gedeon had to fight with his leopard every single minute of every day. It wore on him. She knew he couldn’t sleep at night. He used the gym and worked out on the heavy bags. He went to the club and had rough sex with various women. When he came home, he was still fighting his leopard and unable to lie down to rest. He paced endlessly. Knowing she was upstairs made it difficult for him not to ask her to come down to his suite when he became desperate for sleep.