There was truth in her tone. Honesty. Trepidation. She was afraid of something. Maybe him. He couldn’t tell. His leopard? Slayer? That was a possibility if she thought her leopard might rise.
“Do you believe you have a leopard, Meiling? Tell me the truth.”
She sighed. “The probability is high. I was surrounded by leopards. The family fostering me was leopard. So, yes, she’s never showed herself, but she most likely is there.”
“You have no family at all? You’re certain?”
“They’re all dead. I do know that much. Libby’s father told her my family was murdered. It seemed too big of a coincidence that Libby’s family was murdered, even though it was some years later. Then the neighbors who took us in. I told Libby it was smarter to live apart. It made it more difficult to pay for things, but I felt it was safer for her—for both of us.”
“You’re certain whoever is stalking you is after you and not Libby. Libby was kidnapped and taken to the jungle camp and eventually murdered.”
“Yes, but I don’t think she was taken by the same people. I had to track her, and the kidnappers didn’t feel the same. In any case, Gedeon, my hesitation isn’t because I don’t like you or because I don’t want to work with you, it’s just the opposite. I wouldn’t know what to do being around you all the time. And I honestly don’t think it’s safe for you or Rene.”
“I’m not going to be blind forever, Meiling,” he said as gently as he could. “You like to tease me and I’ll admit, from you I like it, but from anyone else I wouldn’t take it. I’m not a nice man and I never will be. Whoever these people are that are stalking you, they don’t stand a chance if they come looking for you and you’re with me. You did your homework and looked into me. I know you did. You’re that kind of woman. You have to know what I’m really like. I kill and I do it without much thought if someone deserves it. I’ll protect you, Meiling.”
“Who will protect you, Gedeon?” She whispered the question, her voice dripping with tears.
Gedeon couldn’t help himself. He touched her face with the pads of his fingers, mapping it out like a blind man for the first time. Committing every inch to memory. Feeling for tears along with her delicate bone structure. He’d always known he was broken, and that there was so much damage and trauma done to him, there was no way to fix him or his leopard. There was only one way out for a man like him. But for just a little while Meiling had managed to bring laughter and joy into his world. She’d given him a taste of what it could be like to live and share life with another being.
He realized he wasn’t the only one damaged or traumatized. Just maybe Meiling was broken too. He needed her and he knew it. He acknowledged it. But it was possible she needed him just as much. She was fighting the desire to stay with him, using every excuse possible. She did have a strong protective nature.
Slayer, this is important. Is your mate with Meiling? Is that why you accept Meiling so easily? It was difficult to get the importance of the questions to his leopard in images. Even the questions. This was never something he had discussed with his leopard. Their world had always been one of violence. He had never considered that one day Slayer’s mate would walk into their lives.
I cannot say. When she is close to us, I feel at peace. I do not feel the same with any other human.
The leopard fell silent and Gedeon thought the large cat wouldn’t say anything else, but he stirred again. I reach for her at times, thinking I feel her, but if she is there, she is elusive. I do not find her even when I call to her. Meiling is good for you. She is good for me. We should keep her.
To the leopard, it was that simple. In human terms, the situation was fraught with complication.
Gedeon set down his coffee cup and reached with both hands for Meiling’s hands. “You’ll protect me, Lotus. I have total faith in your abilities. Being with me will only enhance your skills. Mine will grow just being with you. Once I’m better we can work out together on a regular basis. That will bring our physical skills up as well.”
He rubbed his thumbs over the backs of her hands. Her bones were small. Felt fragile for a shifter. He despised not being able to see her. But without sight, he could feel her energy so much more acutely. There was an awareness that hadn’t been there before. He let himself breathe her in. She was struggling with commitment. She wanted it. She just couldn’t make herself give him her word. To her that would be binding.