Sera. Notliessa. He hadn’t called me that since I’d been in his bed, after I’d given him my blood. That had been a slip of the tongue then, something done in a moment of pleasure.
Nyktos loomed, a good head or two taller than I was. “You are…” His jaw flexed, nostrils flaring. “What you carry inside you is far too important. They have to be part of the key to ending what Kolis has done. You may value those embers as little as you do your life, but I do not.”
What I carried inside me. The embers were important. Not me. Never me.
I backed off, taking several steps. Did I expect him to say something else? That I mattered? To him? And that he cared for me, even though he couldn’t love? After what I’d plotted? I didn’t.
I justwantedit to be different.
Nyktos’s chest rose sharply. “Sera—” A knock on the door interrupted us. His head cut in the direction of the sound. “What?” he barked.
My gaze flew to the entryway. I wouldn’t have been surprised if whoever was there had simply backed away.
The doors opened to reveal Rhahar, his skin a warm, deep brown in the soft glow of the lamplight. Though nothing about his expression was warm as his gaze flickered over me. “There’s a problem at the Pillars.”
Most souls faced judgment at the Pillars of Asphodel. They were either rewarded with the Vale or sentenced to the Abyss. The Pillars couldn’t judge some; their lives were far too complicated, and it required Nyktos’s presence.
“How urgent?” Nyktos demanded as Rhahar’s cousin drifted in behind him.
“Urgent enough to risk interrupting you,” Saion replied blandly, a hand resting on the hilt of the sword strapped to his hip.
Nyktos cursed, shoving a hand over his head as he stalked to the credenza.
“Is everything okay?” I asked as Nyktos reached the cupboard.
Rhahar didn’t look in my direction as he nodded, not elaborating. Pressure clamped down on my chest, even though his reaction didn’t come as a surprise. My betrayal of Nyktos was a betrayal to all of them.
Breathing through the tightness in my chest, I turned to Nyktos as he grabbed the back collar of his shirt, then pulled it up and over his head. My eyes nearly fell out of my face as the lean muscles running down the length of his spine appeared, along with the swirling drops of blood inked into his skin—drops that represented all the lost lives Nyktos believed he was responsible for.
Proof that he cared deeply for more than one.
Muscles bunched along his broad shoulders and biceps as he tossed the shirt aside and pulled out a gray tunic from a lower cabinet in the credenza. His body was a masterpiece, proof of years spent fighting with heavy swords instead of using the eather inside him.
I knew I shouldn’t stare as he tugged the tunic on. It didn’t feel like I had a right to do that now, nor did it seem like something I should be doing at the moment. But he was…well, really nice to look at. And I really liked looking at him.
“I clearly remember someone saying that it was inappropriate to stare,” Nyktos’s low voice interrupted. “Especially when it’s clearlyintentional.”
My gaze flew to his as warmth blossomed in my chest. The wisps of eather were churning again. “It wasn’t intentional.”
He smirked. “You lie so prettily.”
I had totally lied. The apples of my cheeks burned as he donned the tunic with an iron-hued brocade around the raised collar and across the chest in a diagonal line. But the warmth cooled rapidly. I was sure there was a coded dig there, except all I could think about was when he’d said that to me before. He’d been teasing then.
Rhahar cleared his throat, reminding me that we weren’t alone.
“Saion, escort Sera to her chambers,” Nyktos said, and the god looked less than pleased with the orders as Nyktos’s cool gray eyes met mine. “We’ll finish this conversation when I return.”
“Looking forward to it,” I muttered.
“I’m sure you are.” Nyktos started for the doors, then stopped. A heartbeat passed. “Try to get some rest.” Then he left, disappearing into the hall with Rhahar.
Saion gestured at the doors. “Let’s go.”
Resisting the urge to plant my ass on the floor for no reason other than the fact that I hated being told what to do, I went to the settee and grabbed my dagger.
“Should I be worried right now?” Saion asked, falling into step beside me as we walked out and down the hall. He eyed the dagger clenched tightly in my hand.
“Not unless you give me a reason to use it against you.”