This guy must bench press cars when he’s bored. Or maybe wrestles alligators just for fun. Do alligators live here? I hope that’s just a southern thing.
He crosses his arms over his chest, and Lilah rears back like she’s about to kick him in the shin, when Bill grapples her, dragging her toward the altar, where Benson is laughing and waiting.
“I’m not popping out multiples, you interfering, meddling sons of bitches!” Lilah threatens, still struggling even as the Wedding March plays. “I mean it, Aunt Penny! I’ll go get all my baby-making parts cut out of me before I give birth to a litter! Benson, this is just the start of it! You have to fight with me. Next they’ll force us to have babies!”
I can’t help but find this all weirdly fascinating. And somewhat hilarious. I’ve never seen a bride being dragged down the aisle before, as she swears she’s not delivering a litter. She’s a triplet. Her mother was a twin. Benson is a twin…
She’s worried they’ll start demanding babies, and she’s horrified at facing a possible army coming out of her, given their odds.
“It’ll ruin my vagina! Don’t let them do this!” Lilah shouts. “You love my vagina, Benson!”
Definitely a first.
Benson grins bigger, running his hand along the side of his trimmed beard before walking toward the struggling woman who Bill is starting to lose the tug-of-war battle with.
Benson grabs her, and before she can fight with him, he kisses her. Hard. For a really, uncomfortably long time.
Howls break out, and I startle, forgetting these people really love a good howl.
Lilah stops fighting, and she melts against Benson, softening more and more until she’s practically butter in his hands.
He walks backwards, taking her with him, as Bill wipes sweat off his brow, panting as he trails them.
“Who gives this woman, Lilah Vincent, away?” the officiate asks as he holds a bible in his hands.
I’ve never heard it worded that way, but sure. Why not?
“Her aunt and I give her away. For fuck’s sake, just hurry before she snaps out of the trance and starts fighting again,” Bill says, still panting as he drops to a chair beside Penny, exhausted.
Penny pats his arm as she grins so hugely and dabs tears out of her eyes with the handkerchief in her other hand.
Kylie is grinning, and her eyes find mine again. I can barely hear anything else.
I finally force my eyes away as I hear the officiate asking Lilah the million dollar question.
Benson says something in Lilah’s ear, and in a trance-like state, she says, “I do.”
He leans back, and her eyes widen like she realizes what just happened.
“I do too,” Benson quickly says as the man asks him the same question.
“You tricked me!” Lilah accuses, and Benson laughs as he kisses his bride without permission, subduing her once again.
“You may kiss the bride,” the man sighs. “I now pronounce you husband and wife. And blah blah blah. Damn Wild One weddings,” he adds, grumbling as he walks away.
It’s almost a roar of howls that break free around me, and I laugh, clapping as I watch Kylie howl with the rest of them. Hell, even I’m tempted to howl.
But before I can decide on that, everyone is suddenly moving chairs. It turns into a frenzy as tables come out of nowhere, getting setup around the edges.
I’m still sitting in the middle, me and my lone chair, completely dumbfounded by how fast they’re changing the whole setup.
Idly, I spot Kylie as she’s pulling her boots off, carefully placing them in a box like they’re fragile, then places the box in a wooden chest, before shutting the lid and latching it.
My lips tug up in a confused grin, because as always, she’s an enigma.
I slowly stand, lift my chair, and move it to a table as the altar area turns into a small platform stage. They pull sheets off of it, revealing amps, and microphone stands come next.
They pull back the small curtain that is hung on two poles to reveal a piano, drums, and a couple of guitars.
My eyebrows go up, but I’m distracted when Becky is suddenly beside me, handing me a beer.
“Did you like the cobbler?” she asks as I take the beer, admittedly checking the cap for puncture marks before I twist it off.
“Killian loved it,” I tell her tightly, looking around for Kylie.
This won’t look good, and I definitely need to look good on day one of our reunion. In the back of my mind, there was always this really stupid hope that she wouldn’t care about Felicia or the fact I was an absolute fucking dick to have forgotten her.
“Oh,” Becky grumbles, then brightens immediately. “I’ll just bring you another one. They won’t be at your house later, will they? Because—”
“Walk away, Becky,” Kylie’s voice interrupts as she comes up on my other side, smirking at Becky.