“I’m so in awe of you, Fee.” I raise my glass to her. We clink them together. “You’re so incredibly talented.”
“Smoke and mirrors. I feel like I’m always on the brink of disaster.” She sinks into a plush dining room chair.
“It’s tough balancing motherhood, marriage, and career. Connor and I are trying to figure it all out. I’m having a hard time giving up control,” I can’t help but blurt out. Fiona’s a great listener and I don’t have anyone else to talk to about this stuff from a woman’s perspective. With my production company going through a rough patch and the scandals looming over my head, I just don't feel comfortable bringing Kris into my personal life.
Best to let her have plausible deniability. For now.
“Zane wants a baby so bad. I do too. It’s just…I put my life on hold when I gave birth to Mia. I wouldn’t change anything because she’s my world, but once Gus is up and running…” She looks out the window, a flicker of sadness tinges her expression.
“I had my IUD implanted without telling Connor. He knows now, but he was not happy.” My hand flies up to my mouth at my revelation. A few sips of wine and, apparently, I have loose lips.
Fiona’s head snaps back in my direction. “Ronni Miller. Taking control over your own body. Was he pissed?”
I nod. “Very. Not because I did it. Because I didn’t tell him.”
“If I can give you some advice you’re not asking for, the two of you are adorable together. I’ve known Connor a long time and he’s never loved someone like he loves you. Don’t make the mistake I made with Zane. We lost too much time because of my inability—or fear—to simply talk to him.” Fiona grips my hand, which is wrapped around the base of my wine glass.
I shake my head. “We’re in counseling. I’ve been taking care of myself for so long. For most of our relationship, Connor’s been away with the band. It’s been an adjustment over the past couple of years since the wedding. Now the kids.”
“True. You guys have had a lot going on. Speaking of which, are you okay?” She releases my hand and drains the rest of her wine.
I suck in a breath. “I’m scared. The powers that be are threatening to remove me from the movie to avoid negative publicity. Kircher is bound and determined to take me down with him. I’m trying to get a handle on the narrative to let me keep my job, but he has trolls and bots everywhere. It’s like whack-a-mole.” I decide to keep the bullshit with Yolanda to myself. Man was I pissed when Connor told me what happened. So far, nothing’s come of it. Why tempt fate by saying it out loud?
“Even if that happens, weather the storm. You have a decent, respectable man. Beautiful boys.” She leans over and hugs me. I’m so moved, I can’t help but hug her back tightly. “Do you mind if I go change real quick before I finish the food?"
“Of course not. I want to check on our husbands. Who knows what the hell trouble they'll get into.” I finish my wine, follow her back into the kitchen and pluck an olive off a charcuterie board that looks like flowers and vines. “Things have been quiet on the kid-front too, it always worries me a little.”
Fiona shrugs. “If I know Mia, she's pretending like the twins are her dolls. Olga’s there too so everything's probably fine. I'll pop in to check, though.”
I wander out the front door under a blue-and-white balloon arch. Connor and Zane are diligently tying blue balloons of every shade to the lights along the walkway. “Looks great. I'm positive no one will need to ask twice what's happening here.”
“Look, I've never been to a baby shower before. I'm doing the best I can.” Zane grins cheekily. “Plus, there can never be too many balloons.”
“Shouldn't you guys get outta here soon?” I check my phone for the time.
Connor comes up behind me and wraps his arms around my waist. “You wanna get rid of me, my love?”
I swat him.As if.
Zane checks his phone. “My mom's gonna be here in a second. I want to see her before we take off. Zoey and Alex's moms should be here soon too.”
The three of us go back inside. Connor and I check on the kids, who are all napping. Fiona and Zane’s middle-aged nanny, Olga is also napping. I close the door behind me and turn around into a wall of my studly husband. He grips my face in his hands, leans down and kisses me passionately.
“You look delicious enough to eat, so you do.” He nibbles on my neck.
I hook my thumbs in his beltloops and cup his tight butt. “Ah, I think that's you. Residual from when all the girls on set called you eight-pack behind your back.”
He blushes. “I'm so glad that's over.”
“You know I've got to tell everyone, right? If they find out just by watching it, you're gonna catch so much flack.” I squeeze his buns for emphasis.
He rolls his eyes. “If you do, I'll have to tell the guys. They'll never, ever let me live this down.”
“Let you live what down?” Zane suddenly appears in the hallway.
Connor palms his forehead. “Ah, bollocks.”
“If I tell you something, do you promise not to tell Ty and Jace?” I release my grip on Connor's ass. “It's a big secret.”