Cam’s dark gaze never wavers as he continues studying me. As if he’s looking for a crack in the façade, wondering if he’ll witness me breaking.
“If you say so.”
Both of our heads turn at the same time, taking in the scene happening around our table. Our area is completely overcrowded thanks to the women who’ve planted themselves next to the guys. Which is fine, since this is a common occurrence on a Monday night at Logan’s, but normally, I have a girl with me too.
Tonight, though, not a single one of them appeals to me.
“Do you ever get sick of playing this game?” I ask Cam with a weary sigh.
“Football? Hell no—”
“I’m not talking football,” I interrupt. “I mean with women. As in, a different woman every week or whatever.”
Cam chuckles. “You are definitely not feeling well.”
“Shut up,” I say, no viciousness in my tone. “I think I need a change.”
“What do you mean?”
“Maybe I should become celibate.” I rub my chin, processing the word over and over again in my brain.
Celibate.
Celibate.
As in no sex. No women. No distractions.
“What, so now you’re a nun?”
“Not quite. But women are a total distraction, one I don’t need this semester. Maybe even for the entire year.”
“You’re out of your mind.”
“Maybe no women for just the football season then.” The more I think about it, the more appealing it sounds. Which is crazy, I can’t lie, but damn, I need to do something to alleviate the pressure that’s slowly but surely getting a stranglehold on me.
“Doesn’t having sex relieve some of that pressure for you?” Cam asks, appearing perplexed.
I get it. I’m not making much sense. I’m not acting like my usual self, but maybe that’s the problem.
I need to change it up. Become even more focused on the important things in my life. Football. School. I can’t fuck up. Too much is on the line.
Like my future.
“Hey.” Cam nudges Derek in the side, getting his attention. “Knox says he’s giving up women for the football season.”
Derek snorts, turning to face us, momentarily ignoring the clingy woman whose tits are pressed to his chest, her hand curled around the back of his neck. “Yeah right.”
“I’m serious.”
He gently pushes the girl away as he studies my expression, then starts nodding, his gaze finding Cam’s. “I think he is.”
“Bullshit,” Cam mutters.
“Naw, it’s true. I need to do something about this—” I wave a hand around me, “feeling I’ve been dealing with.”
“Eliminating sex from your schedule is pretty extreme,” Cam says.
“I can do it.” I lift my chin, vaguely offended Cam doesn’t believe in me. “It’s already been two months since I got laid.”