I almost feel it slipping in again—that pain I’ve done such a good job of pushing down all these years. I reached a point in my life where I told myself that the fact that my mother never wanted me would never bother me again, but for some reason, explaining it all to Josie has those feelings coming back, like the opening of an old wound.
Of course, I’ve never spoken about this to anyone before. I guess that could have something to do with it.
She approaches me, a pained look in her eyes, but a look also filled with empathy. It makes me want to turn away or change the subject, but I can’t. It’s like my feet are stuck in concrete, and all I can do is watch as she moves in and reaches up and touches a hand to my cheek.
“I know what you’re feeling, Magnus.”
Her words shock me like a bullet to the chest.
“Do you?” I almost scoff. I want to believe her, but how could she? Her mother is still alive. She has the beauty of a goddess.
Josie nods. “I grew up in a place not much different than this. Our hot water never worked because we never had money for the bills because my dad was a degenerate gambler. His debt caught up to him when I was twelve and…” She looks away. “He went out one night, and we never saw him again.”
“Jesus, Josie, I’m sorry.”
“I’ve learned to deal with it, but it’s one of those things you neverreallycome to terms with, you know?” I nod and take her hand in mine. It’s so small and so soft, so tender. Every protective instinct in me is brought out by her presence.
“It was just my mom and me after that. I thought things were going all right, but my mom just couldn’t handle things, I guess. She got…well…”
“Drugs?”
Josie nods. “Vincent got her hooked on them. Pretty soon she was…well, she just wanted to be around him all the time. But she couldn’t afford her addiction, so she startedworkingfor him.”
“Christ,” I growl, clenching my fist at my side. I knew Vincent was a real son of a bitch, but I never thought he would stoop to that level.
“Vincent came and asked me if I was ‘untouched,’” Josie says. “He told me the only way I could ever get my mother back was if I married him. Gave him my…cherry.”
I growl, wrap my arm around her, and pull her close to me. She’s so tiny and warm. If only I’d met her earlier, I never would have let any of this happen to her.
“That’s what he was yelling at you about at the club,” I say. “You holding out on him…”
“Yes.” She nods, her voice soft. “I just can’t bring myself to do it.”
The only thing I should be thinking about right now is the terrible tale Josie just told me. I should be coming up with a plan on how to free her mother and end this once and for all. But all I can focus on right now is the feel of Josie’s body against mine.
Her warmth has me completely disarmed. I’d guess by the feel that she has two perfect c-cups under her dress, and she’s definitely not wearing a bra tonight. I let my hand drift down to her back, following her natural curves to the top of her firm little ass that I caught a glimpse of earlier. She doesn’t stop me, so I stop myself.
“I…I shouldn’t, Josie.” I start to pull away, but Josie grabs me with both hands and holds us together.
“Why, Magnus? Why?”
“I’m not good enough for you, Josie.”
“Don’t be stupid, Magnus!” she says in a tone that sounds like she’s almost scolding me. “We’re just like each other, you and me.”
I turn my head from her. It’s impossible to gaze at her beauty.
“Maybe…” I admit. “Butlookat me, Josie.”
“Stop that,” Josie whispers, turning my face back to hers with the tender palm of her hand. “Your mom may not have wanted you, Magnus, butI do.”
She takes a few steps back from me, holding her eyes to mine. A feeling of tenderness sweeps over me like nothing I’ve ever felt before. I’m completely disarmed by this girl. She’s like magic.
Then, without warning, she reaches up behind her neck with both hands and undoes the strap on her dress. It falls off her like water, exposing her body, leaving her standing completely naked before me.
“I do, Magnus,” she repeats. “Now what are you going to do about it?”
4