She was not sure what was bothering her more, the fact Elise was here or the hug. The scent of Elise’s perfume still filled her nostrils, light floral notes, lilac and lily of the valley. When they were younger Gwen had teased her that she chose the same perfume as their grandma’s. Elise had always smiled and said she didn’t mind that, it only proved they all have classic timeless taste. Gwen had always been in such a rush to grow up and prove that she was just like her mum, a strong, independent woman.
She had thought part of the way she could show that was with the latest perfumes and make-up. She had dragged Elise around town any chance she got searching in department stores, supermarkets, and chemists for any bargains she could grab. There had been a perfume shop that regularly sold off the testers cheap and she had bought them even if they were less than half full so she could not only try them, but she could display the bottles on her dressing table.
When she left for the States they had all ended up in the bin, she couldn’t send them in the container with all their personal belongings and there were too many to take with her.
“Gwen, Gwen?”
The sound of Nate’s voice brought her back into the present.
“Sorry, my mind wandered, there’s been a lot going on.”
“No problem, you ready to order?”
“Yup, Roast beef Sunday dinner for me, jam roly poly and custard for dessert. It’s been so long since I had a proper pudding, can you believe you can’t get jam roly poly in the States?”
Nate used the app to order the food and then they fell into generally catch-up gossip. Out of the corner of her eye Gwen kept seeing Elise watching her, she wasn’t sure why. Everything was almost as natural as it had been before she had made her declaration but there it was, the white elephant in the room, the thing no one was talking about. The arrival of food silenced the chatter, it was replaced with the clatter of cutlery and the sounds of appreciation of good food. Finally, when all the plates were empty, they picked up their glasses and moved out to the outdoor seating area.
“So, when do you go back to the States? It was Nate that asked but Elise was the one who looked directly at her.
“I have a flight tomorrow night.”
“What? So soon? Jake thought you were here for at least another week.” Elise sounded upset as she responded.
“I was going to be but then I got a call from my boss, he needs me in the office for a client presentation on Thursday. My mum is staying another week to sort out emptying the house for me and getting the storage unit secured. I still need to sort out the estate agent and tie up a few loose ends. I know I can do a lot of it over video call, but I am thinking I will come back at the end of the month for a week or two for a proper holiday.”
“Well, you will definitely do well on the house, me and Nate have been looking for somewhere new to rent for the last three months, and we can’t afford anything decent. You should see some of the places we have looked at, the last one was a one-bedroom flat. I swear the door was reinforced with steel and they want £800 a moth for it. I would never have dared to sleep again with the amount of security they seemed to feel they needed on the door.”
“Hang on! You have let me talk about renting out the house and all the time you have been needing somewhere to live?”
“We don’t need somewhere to live - Jake is making it sound more drastic than it is. Our landlord is thinking about selling, so he changed us to a month-to-month lease. We decided to start looking around to see what there is, and yes, we have looked at some real dives, but your gran’s house will be way outside what we can afford.”
“Or it would be if you weren’t friends with the new owner?”
“No! Friends should never enter into business arrangements.”
“You would be doing me a favour. Look, we will set up with the solicitor a proper lease, I will charge you a lower rent on the condition you allow me to use the small bedroom to crash in when I come back to Cardiff. I get to know the house is being looked after, I have money coming in and I save on hotels! See, it’s the perfect solution!”
“Are you sure? You’re not teasing me are you?” Jake was out of his chair moving towards her before she could answer and had his arms wrapped around her in a hug before she could finish her reply.
“Does this mean you are definitely coming back?” Elise asked tentatively.
“Yes and no, I have a life in the States, I have a roommate and a six-month lease on an apartment. Plus, that’s where my job is, well, where the offices are anyway. But I am hoping to be able to find a way that will allow me to travel back and spend a couple of weeks here every few months. I can’t explain it, it just feels right being here, I missed you guys so much.”
They sat and enjoyed a few drinks and catching up on what had gone on in their lives since they last saw each other but neither Gwen or Elise broached the last conversation they had had before Gwen’s departure for the states. Gwen considered it several times but decided not to rock the boat, if she was going to be able to come back then there would be plenty of time to discuss it. Maybe, if she left it until things were more relaxed between them, then they would be able to chat about it without embarrassment and they could at least get their friendship back on track.
By eight Gwen was feeling the effects of the alcohol and said her goodbyes, as she walked back to her hotel, she thought more about the afternoon’s events. She had been so shocked to see Elise, she hadn’t let herself consider how she really felt. Gwen had spent so many years protecting her heart she thought she would be safe from her first love. First unrequited love. How had she misread the situation so badly back then, it wasn’t a mistake she would make again. No, she and Elise could be friends, she would not waste her time longing for anything more.
Despite her conviction she was over it, the pain in her heart told her otherwise. She had never stopped loving Elise, but she would have to learn to live with keeping her emotions locked away if she wanted to come home.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Gwen had been busy all day tying up the contract for Nate and Jake with the solicitor. They had said they would come and see her off at the airport and though she had told them they didn’t need to, they had insisted. Jake was in the shower getting ready to leave, when the phone rung and Nate picked it up.
“Hey Elise, what’s up?”
“I’m not coming to the airport. Can you say sorry for me and tell Gwen I’ll catch up with her when she is home next time?”
“Why aren’t you coming? I only spoke to you an hour ago, what’s happened?”