When she arrived at the club, she felt underdressed. She had not brought a lot of going out clothes with her. Wearing tight black jeans and a silver backless top paired with silver strappy sandals, she was dressed for a night out in a bar but here she disappeared in a carnival of colour, feathers and sequins. Squeezing through to the bar she spotted Nate scanning the room looking for her and made her way over to him.
“Hi, glad you could make it. I was worried you’d change your mind.”
His arms wrapped around her in an embrace and for a moment Gwen felt tears welling up before regaining her composure and looking up at him.
“I wouldn’t miss this for anything. Plus, I really need to let my hair down. After the day I have had.”
“It went that well?”
“I now own a house and as you can imagine my dad is not happy about that.”
“Ahh, well right now let’s get you a cocktail and get to our table, we have one reserved, boyfriend perks.”
Nate ordered two pitchers then led the way to a table right next to the stage. Gwen was glad that the music and chatter around them stopped Nate being able to ask too many questions. She knew that would come later but for the next few hours she could completely relax, she couldn’t remember the last time she laughed so much.
WhenJackiecame out on stage, she grinned so broadly her face hurt. Her friend had been transformed into a stunning woman. Gwen was reminded of some of the models she had worked with, both she and Kristal worked for an advertising agency. She had an idea for a campaign that she had just been asked to come up with possible adverts for. She held up her phone and facetimed Kristal so she could enjoy part of the show and texted her that she would call her later to discuss her ideas.
While she had been away, she had worked on campaigns that were on going with Kristal, they were working well together this way and her boss was happy with the results. While the boss was onside it gave her more flexibility to extend the stay for another week, that would allow her to sort the house and its contents.
By the time the show ended, and Jake joined them at the table, Gwen was starting to feel the effects of the alcohol. She wasn’t drunk but she felt the warm fuzzy feeling created by the mixture of drinks, friends and a good night. She had spotted several other people she knew throughout the night. Some had come over to say hi, some just waved from across the room, but she had not seen the one person she had been hoping to. She knew she was being stupid, even if she had wanted to see Gwen and speak to her, she had no way of knowing where she was tonight or what her plans were.
“Who’ve you been looking for? I’ve seen you looking around all night?”
“No one, I was just seeing who was here, you forget I haven’t been back in forever. I was just curious.”
“Gwendoline Evans you are a terrible liar!” Nate smiled as he admonished her. “I know who you are looking for.”
“Then why ask?”
“Because I wanted you to say it and then tell us what happened. One minute we were all friends, hanging out together, then you were gone. And before you say, you left the country, I know that but for the week before you left you ignored us all. We had a surprise going away party planned for you and looked really stupid waiting for you to show up.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know. Truth is, I messed up. I did something stupid, and I couldn’t face any of you.” For the second time that evening Gwen felt the tears rising. She realised for years she had been angry at her friends for not staying connected, but the truth was she detached herself from them after the confession.
“What happened? We know something happened between you and Elise. She wouldn’t say, she just kept crying if we tried to talk to her about you, so we let it drop.” Jake put his arm around her pulling her towards him. “Whatever it was, it’s in the past. We can sort it out and make sure we don’t lose touch again. We missed you. So many times, we wanted to reach out, but we didn’t know what had happened and if you wanted to hear from us.”
“I missed you all too! I just didn’t know how to face you all.”
“What could you have possibly done to make us stop loving you? You know there is nothing you could possibly have done for us to turn our backs on you.”
“I told Elise I loved her.”
“What? She knew you loved her, we all loved each other.”
“No, I told her Iloveloved her. She was horrified and ran away.”
“I don’t believe that for one minute. It had to be a misunderstanding.” Nate poured her another drink and passed it to her.
“No, no mistake there, the mistake was me telling her.”
“What happened from the time you left us, tell us everything.”
“We said goodbye to you guys. Then we walked back towards mine. We stopped off at the park and we were messing about on the swings, talking about how we would keep in touch, how she would come to the States and visit. Then we climbed on the roundabout thing and sat facing each other. I swear, until that minute, I hadn’t realised my feelings for her were that strong. I didn’t know that there was more than just being friends on my mind. But she was looking at me and – I don’t know – it felt right, there was chemistry, I swear there was, and she was looking like she wanted me too. Before I knew it, we both leaned in and kissed, it was soft and gentle, it didn’t last long, when we pulled back, we were both breathless. Then I told her how I felt, and her face changed. I saw hatred there.”
“Oh Gwen, why didn’t you tell us. Why did you deal with this on your own?” Nate pulled her against his chest now, and Gwen offered no resistance. Tears ran down her cheeks now, her attempts to supress them failing.
“I was ashamed. I ruined our friendship. I couldn’t just keep my mouth shut and I spoilt everything.”
“You ruined nothing, damn you are an idiot girl. If you had told us we would have talked to her to find out why she reacted that way. And why would we have stopped caring about you if she didn’t feel the same way you did? If you hadn’t noticed we’re gay, we wouldn’t have cared who you loved, we’d have just wanted you to be happy.”