She blinked rapidly. "No, uhm, now is fine. I was ... I was thinking we would have to talk soon. Do you want to come in? I think the kitchen is stocked. There might be some tea or coffee."
"Coffee sounds nice, yeah."
Ken followed Beth into the house and sat down at the kitchen table as she went to make them some coffee. He watched her move around the kitchen, filling the kettle with water and setting it on the stove. She was clearly in no hurry to get this conversation started, but he knew they needed to talk.
And so he stayed quiet, letting Beth take her time. Ken couldn't help but steal glances at her as she moved about, putting on a kettle and finding mugs in a cupboard. She was still hurting, he could see it in the way she carried herself, like she was weighed down by sorrow.
He wanted to comfort her somehow, but how could he when he knew he was part of the reason she was hurting?
He had no idea how to set this right.
They had a lot of things they needed to talk about first—things they had both been avoiding up until this point. A few minutes later, Beth came back to the table with two steaming mugs of coffee. He took a tentative sip. Sugar but no cream for him, just like always. She'd remembered how he liked his coffee.
It was such a simple thing, and yet it warmed his heart to her all the same. He realized then that hewantedto hear what she had to say,wantedto believe that it had been goblin magic that tore them apart, even before another word had come out of her mouth.
"I never thought I would see you again." Ken played with the handle of his mug. "Seeing you yesterday ... it was like seeing a ghost. Like you'd walked straight out of a dream. I was angry and terrified and confused all at once, and that turned me into an ass. I'm sorry."
Beth was quiet for a long minute. She took sips of her coffee just to avoid speaking right away. At last, she said, "It's not okay, the things you said. But I ... I understand your reaction."
"That doesn't make it excusable. I should have ... I should have had more grace. I haven't a clue what you've been through, and whether there are goblins out there or not is beside the point."
"Is it?"
"I ... I don't know. Maybe not. Maybe it is the point." Ken rubbed his eyes with the heel of his hand. "I want to believe that you didn't leave me because you wanted to. That there was some other force at work, something beyond our control. But I just have a hard time believing it was the goblins. They're supposed to be all dead or gone."
Her teeth tugged at the bottom of her lip while she was deep in thought, and Ken couldn't help but wish it was his teeth nibbling on her.
Beth sighed and set down her mug. "I know what you think, and what everyone else thinks of me, because of the claims I made. I saw it in your eyes. You think I'm crazy, right?"
"No, I don't. You're a very smart woman, I've always known that. But there are a lot of things out there that even we shifters can't explain. It's possible you saw something, and the easiest way to explain it was the goblins."
"I know you're just trying to find a way to understand what happened in a way that makes sense to you, Ken, and I appreciate that. But I know what I saw. I know what I experienced. Maybe I didn't know what was happening when I left you all those years ago, but I know I had no choice."
"What do you mean, you had no choice? There's always a choice."
"I felt it, in that painful rush that I experienced when my memories came back, just how angry and terrified the goblins had made me. They twisted my feelings for you to make me believe I had to get away, Ken. You have to believe me when I say that it tore me apart. It was like being in the passenger seat in my own body. Can you imagine what it's like, being controlled by something powerful and evil? I tried to fight it, but I couldn't. It was too strong."
Sometimes when Ken lost himself to his wolf side, he felt as though he were a passenger, too. His wolf was strong enough to take control away from him completely sometimes, but in the end, his wolf always gave back control. It sounded like what Beth had gone through was like that, but worse.
It had lasted fourteen years.
"Beth ... " Ken reached out to touch her hand, but she pulled away before he could make contact.
"Don't," she said sharply. "Just ... don't."
She took a deep breath and continued speaking in a calmer voice. "I'm sorry for how things ended between us, Ken. I know I hurt you. I never wanted to, but I did. I hope you can understand that."
Looking into her eyes now, he could see that she absolutely meant it. The connection they shared as mates was still there, like an invisible web drawing them together. The tiniest vibrations of her emotions and thoughts reflected back at him, all that was left of a mate bond that once had been so powerful he could look at her and know what she was thinking.
He hadn't wanted to believe her before, but he did now.
"I believe you," he murmured. "I want to be angry at you, and I was at first, because you showed your face here without coming to me first, but I think I get it now. You were terrified about what would happen to the town if you didn't tell someone about the goblins."
The harshness around her eyes faded, and she let out a tiny breath. "That's right."
"The truth is, Beth ... I've been hoping, every day for the last fourteen years, that you would come back to me. I didn't think it would be like this, but I'm glad you're here."
"You ... you are?" She gave him a shy, innocent smile, and her eyes were wide with wonder. There was only a little bit of redness left, and damn if he didn't want to just kiss it all away. "So you don't have a wife I have to fight off?"