Part Two
Tenyearsofmy life came and went in a blink of an eye. I’m no longer that stupid young college girl in love with a criminal, and neither am I the woman that settled and married a man that could never make me feel the same way as Colby. Now, I’m a divorced mother, still dwelling on all of my losses. Colby was my best friend, the love of my life, but after he vanished without saying a word, I transferred all that love to the child I was carrying. But fate took that too, and soon after, I lost my last connection to Colby, my baby.
Every day that I think of him, my heart shatters into a thousand pieces. He died. He’s gone, and no one is looking for him. I called the morgue and hospitals every day for six months, even when I was riddled with grief for our child. The police made it clear they couldn’t give a fuck. Now, I call the morgue once a month. I’m on a first name basis with the assistant medical examiner. He expects my call on the final Thursday of every month, like clockwork.
When I check in, he gives me a list of any unidentifiable bodies he has. I drive my ass into the heart of the city with knots in my stomach to identify Colby Monroe. Ten years in, I’m not even sure I would recognize his body. I don’t know if I can remember what his nose looks like, or if I can recall his smile. How different would he look with wrinkles? Did he age much in a decade? Would he even still be blonde? Maybe he was running from the law, so he dyed his hair, or maybe it turned gray.
“None this month, Andi.” Kyle Dake’s voice brings me to the present.
I exhale the breath that I’ve been holding. The one I always hold until Kyle tells me he has no bodies for me to come see. “Thank you, Kyle. Say hello to the kids.” I hang up the phone and grab the bottle of beer off the ledge of the horse stall I’m mucking out.
Oh, yeah. Did I mention that I’m a millionaire lawyer who owns a fucking farm now? My dream life, yet I’m clinically depressed. It doesn’t matter what I do, I’m destined to be miserable. I guess being heartbroken and betrayed does that to you. The only thing that can brighten up my days is my baby girl, Charlotte. She’s with my ex today, so it’s just me and my beer mucking out horse poop on this beautiful evening. She should be home soon, and I can’t wait. It’s been a long weekend without her.
Farm life has been good for me. My blood pressure has never been better, my health is finally back on track, and Charlotte’s anxiety seems to be under control, too. Surprisingly, she did great through the separation, and I attribute it to being able to stay busy on the farm.
My ex, Matt, also stays involved. We’ve been separated a year now, and until this week, he lived in the pool house on the property so that he could be involved with mornings and bed time.
He is an amazing dad and was a patient husband. I’m thankful to share our girl with him. I’m also thankful that we had decided not to go for blood during the divorce. Though we had a prenup, we hadn’t really needed it. What was his before our marriage remained, and what I obtained with my successful law career was mine. That included the farm.
My head turned at the sound of footsteps entering the barn. Terry Black approaches, a camera bag slung over his shoulder. His boots kick up dust from the dirt as he enters the four-stall barn. My prized possession.
“Hey, Andi.” Terry sets his camera bag down on a metal folding chair. He walks towards the horse tied outside the stall I was cleaning, and strokes the bridge of his nose. Ace is my oldest horse, and Charlotte’s favorite to ride. Ace lets out a snort and nudges his nose against Terry’s hand, demanding more pats.
“Hey, Terry.” I step back from the wheelbarrow of horse shit. “You’re here early. Charlotte is still with Matthew. She’ll be here soon.”
“No worries. I figured I could get some shots of the barn for you.”
I met Terry about a year ago, when he was covering a story for a 4 H fundraiser, and hired him for family photos, as well as other photo ops, and headshots off and on.
On some weekends, when he needs the extra money, he’s even known to come help out on the farm. We’ve grown close in the last year.
Though he is much taller than my Colby, and sports long dirty blonde hair with a beard that would make Santa jealous, he holds a lot of characteristics of Colby that I cherish. His free spirit being one of them.
I love having him around to help and feel I have a connection with him I don’t have with most. It always amazes me how much he reminds me of the man, I am so sure, is buried in a ditch, or tossed into the ocean.
“Oh, that would be great. It’s been a while since I’ve updated the website. They’ll look amazing. Thanks for doing this.”
“Yeah, it’s gonna be awesome. Glad I could help. How are things going?”
“They’re going,” I laugh. “I have a date on Wednesday. We’ll see how it goes.”
“Oh, yeah? How did you meet this one?” Terry leans against the wall of the stall, watching me as I roll my eyes at him.
“For your information, I met him at Mac’s through mutual friends.”
“I still think you should let me set you up with my brother, Dom. He’s a little older than you, sure, but he’s a good guy. Always puts others first, great with kids. Financially stable, great smile. I mean, I’m a little better looking than he is, but he’s still a good-looking guy.”
“I dated an older guy once.” My mind drifts back to Colby. It’s been hurting how much he’s been on my mind lately. “He crushed my heart into a million pieces with his fist, then he blew the powder into my face and I suffocated on it. It was a great time. Ten out of ten do not recommend. I’ll never go older again.”
Terry laughs and shakes his head. “Just let me set you up. One date. Can’t hurt, right?”
“It can. And it will. I’ll bet he’s single for a reason.”
“He is actually. He met a girl when he worked undercover years ago, fell in love with her, but once the operation was over, he had to leave her behind. Hasn’t found anyone to live up to her since, apparently.”
“Ahh, so he has a fear of commitment. Is this supposed to make me change my mind?”
“No, he’s not like that.” Terry shakes his head. “I think that once you’ve found someone who gives you meaning, you know you can’t ever settle again.”