She took a while to sit by the table, to gather her thoughts. It seemed to her she had only one course to take, that of being forthright with the man she’d been deceiving and of begging for his forgiveness. Rowena was forever lost to him and, truth be told, now that she’d understood who Rowena really was, she did not wish her upon any man in this world and she would certainly never wish Robin to have such a woman for his mother. She pictured herself telling Arthen the truth and asking him whether he did not wish to have her instead of Rowena for his true wife. Having seen Father Alcuin and many priests like him, Emma had come not to set great store on priests’ blessings. It might be blasphemous of her to think it, yet it was not church blessings that mattered to her, but a bond of trust. Could this thing be God’s way, just as Hild had said? Hadn't God himself let her path entwine with that of this man? She thought upon Arthen andupon the way he had behaved to her, understanding he was a fair man and a good one, and that she would be fortunate to have him as her chosen husband. And never in her life had she lusted for a man as she did for this one. Would it be so wrong of her to want to spend her time by his side? She already knew she could never leave Robin. Was it so wrong and wicked of her to think not only of having Robin as her true son, but Arthen as her true husband?
She spent a sleepless night in the bedchamber, as Arthen had stormed out of the house and she did not know where he’d gone to spend his night. All sorts of thoughts came into her head, and she pictured him in another woman’s arms, avenging himself for what he believed to be her treacherous ways. And she felt deep anguish, coming to understand how enraged he must still feel against a wife who had broken faith with him.
CHAPTER 18
Arthen tried to clear his head, after the night of heavy drinking he’d spent with John in Maggie’s kitchen. Maggie now poured him a mug of a foul-smelling concoction proclaiming it was the best cure for a hangover and that he should drink it at once.
Seeing her glare at him, he drank it sheepishly, thinking the foul aftertaste of it was fair punishment for the night before.
“Where’s John?” he asked, clearing his scratchy throat.
“Still sleeping it off. You know too well he has no head for drink,” Maggie said with a dark frown.
“I’m sorry,” Arthen sighed, however perceiving that Maggie, who’d joined them in their drinking after she’d put her child to bed, seemed to suffer no ill effects from the amount of liquor she’d imbibed.
“It runs in my family. We can all drink like fish,” Maggie enlightened him with a wink, not mistaking his astonished gaze upon her.
Like so many times before, Arthen began to wonder why it was that he had not been able to find himself a woman as worthy and as kind as Maggie, and he envied his friend’s good fortune.
“Now off you go to see to the pupils. I’ll put John back together as soon as I can, but we can’t afford to waste this day and keep them waiting,” Maggie said resolutely.
Arthen nodded, going to wash his face and to right his hair and clothes.
“Listen,” Maggie told him, as she was busying herself around the kitchen. “You need to let this go and start afresh with your woman. There’s nothing but grief to be had if you still hold against her what she did.”
Arthen heaved a deep sigh. As always, Maggie was trying to be kind, but she did not truly know how things lay in his marriage. And truth be told, Arthen himself did no longer know how things lay in his marriage. He’d thought he’d never be able to forgive Rowena for what she’d done, but now his lust of her was blinding him to everything around.
“I believe she is truly changed. Other than she was,” Maggie suddenly proclaimed.
She was voicing the same thoughts his aunt had expressed before, the same thoughts he himself was harbouring. Aye, Rowena was utterly changed.
“I do not think it is deceit. Perchance it’s repentance that is making her seem so different than she was before. Perchance she truly strives to change, understanding she did wrong,” Maggie said with deep feeling.
Arthen said nothing in return, just taking his leave of her, to go to his duties. But Maggie’s words lingered with him the whole morning and he recalled all those moments when it had seemed to him Rowena was very different from what she’d been. The caring way in which she behaved towards their son. And how she’d jumped to shield Robin from harm, with no regard to herself. And the true disgust in her eyes over the corrupt priest’s behaviour. Her willingness to aid him to right this wrong. Itseemed to him she was an entirely new woman, one he’d never known before.
He was so distracted by these thoughts that he paid only half an ear to the way his pupils were buzzing and gleefully laughing among themselves this morning. He could barely focus when one of the boys called to him, “Haven’t you heard, Master? The priest spending the night on the door of a bawdy house and people finding him in the morning. And all those arrows which were pinning him to the door, which they had to pluck away. I wonder who did that? The priest wouldn’t say. He said it was some hooded bandit he was unable to perceive. Everyone’s splitting their sides with laughter!”
The boys tittered, now gathering around him.
“Back to your target practice,” Arthen said pointedly, but it seemed to him the boys were reluctant to go.
“A hooded man. Fancy that! And now the priest saying he’ll leave town as he will no longer be seen in a place where villains prowl at every step…” another boy called impudently.
“Aye,” yet another said with a devilish smile. “A hooded man who’s an archer. Do you reckon it could be Hood himself, Master Archer? The Hood of your tales?”
Arthen shrugged, making his voice sharp on purpose when he ordered them back to their practice. The boys reluctantly complied, but from time to time they cast furtive glances at him. Arthen suppressed a sigh. He supposed many people suspected who was responsible for the priest’s predicament, yet he knew himself to be safe, as the parishioners held no love for their priest and Father Alcuin was afraid his own guilt may come to surface and would be complying with what Arthen had demanded of him.
Rowena came upon him, bringing lunch in a basket that appeared somewhat heavy for her, and he looked upon her in amazement, because before she’d never seen to the day meals.Maggie had always seen to this, also providing food for the boys at their school, because it was a task she did well and capably, which benefited their trade. Arthen had long given up trying to get Rowena to join in some of the duties involved with their school of archery. He now looked upon her with narrowed eyes, understanding Maggie was now interfering.
“Where’s Robin?” he inquired abruptly.
“At Maggie’s. She–”
“Tell Maggie to stop meddling,” he cut her off tersely, as he took hold of the basket.
Rowena sighed.
“She indeed advised I do this task today, but in truth it is I who wanted to speak to you!”