I pull out a cigarette and light it up before tossing the lighter on the table.
I take a drag and let out the smoke.
“It’s hard to believe, but at one point, our lives were normal, like everybody else’s. We had two loving parents, a nice home, and friends. We went to school, and I didn’t care about money or anything else outside my little world. Within a year, we lost both parents. With no family left, it was either the streets or the foster homes. I was almost eighteen.”
“You said she doesn’t know.”
“We never talked about it. I had a job, but it didn’t bring enough money to make ends meet. The second job didn’t make a difference either. Not with two adults and a small child. Plus, I wanted her to get an education. It’s her dream. It was my mom’s. And Dad's. For both of us, actually.”
Tears pool in her eyes again. I smile faintly, take another drag, and breathe the smoke out slowly before speaking again.
“Jacob’s accident came close to Emma’s first anniversary. It broke Sara to pieces. It broke me too. I never thought life could be such a fleeting thing. One day you have everything, and then the next day, you lose everything. That’s hard to understand, especially at that age. His death changed everything for her and me, and decisions needed to be made. I started to go out and come home with extra cash. She didn’t ask, and I didn’t volunteer the information. But if I came home cut and bruised, she’d figure out something happened. The money you gave me after we spent time together in the Keys... I couldn’t give it to her all at once. I didn’t have an explanation for it.”
She looks away, wiping a stray tear.
“I’m sorry.”
I shake my head slowly.
“You don’t have to be sorry. This shit happens all the time. And yes, people do make bad choices, but usually, it’s because they take stuff for granted and forget that, in a sense, all things are borrowed. The time we have, the other’s people time, and the love and kindness of someone. A child... Even a pet. Not all the people who are struggling are where they are because of poor choices. Sometimes, life just leaves you in the dust. And never gives you a second chance. That’s all,” I say dryly while putting my cigarette out.
Silence falls between the tall walls of her house.
A rumbling noise echoes in the distance, and then a bolt of lightning strikes close, followed shortly by the sound of rain splashing on the ground. A gust of wind blows a few drops through the cracked door.
She pushes to her feet.
“Leave it open,” I say.
“You like rain?” she asks.
“Yeah... I do.”
She lowers herself back on the couch, her gaze rooted to the wet windows.
Christmas lights look like smudged colors in the darkness.
We watch them in silence while listening to the sound of rain.
“This is an unusual Christmas,” she murmurs after a few more moments.
“It is, isn’t it?” I say, distracted, my mind wandering away like hers.
I push out of my seat and pick up the empty plates.
“Do you have anything sweet in your house?”
She flicks her gaze up as mine goes down.
“I guess not. You don’t look like you eat much,” I say.
“I do like to eat,” she argues. “What about ice cream?”
“That’ll do.”
She ambles to the refrigerator and pulls out a box.
Moments later, she strolls back to the couch and slides the cups filled with chocolate ice cream onto the table.