That’s what she’d always called him—beautiful—but he’d never asked her to choose a manlier adjective. He knew why she’d chosen beautiful. What they’d had was too special for words like sexy or handsome. With Tulsi, it had always been about more than getting off. Her touch was a blessing that healed every hurt and there was nothing finer than the moment they came together, when he slid inside her and was surrounded by her sweetness, her love, and her good, good heart.
Almost every woman he’d slept with before or since had been more experienced, but none of them had rocked his world the way Tulsi had. Being with her was being naked in every sense of the word. Her body drove him crazy, but it was her vulnerability, the way he could look into her eyes and see a love big enough to save the world, that shattered him. Shattered him and then put him back together again, making him something better than he’d been before. He had been his best version of himself when he was with her, and a part of him had been chasing the perfection he’d found in her arms ever since. But no amount of fame or beauty or accomplishment on the part of the women he’d dated could make them live up to Tulsi. For him, she was in a class by herself.
He supposed some people got a second chance at love, but he had a feeling his one shot at forever was standing in the water a dozen feet away, humming beneath her breath as the sun caught her honey-colored hair and made it shine like a halo.
“You look beautiful,” he said, not regretting the words even though he hadn’t consciously decided to say them. But it was time to stop letting the past define the present. He didn’t want to walk away from this woman and he was sick of pretending he didn’t want Tulsi in his arms more than he wanted his stupid knee to heal.
Tulsi turned with a soft intake of breath. She didn’t speak, but she didn’t tell him to get lost, either, and he decided to take that as a good sign.
“I’m sorry I was an ass Monday,” he said, walking into the water.
“You’re going to ruin your boots,” she said when he stopped in front of her, close enough to catch the heady scent of her sun-warmed skin mixed with the musky-sweet smell of horse, a scent that brought back a hundred sense memories. When they were together, they’d spent every second they weren’t in bed on a horse. He still couldn’t smell a warm barn without thinking of Tulsi, at least for a moment.
“I don’t care,” he said, his voice rough. “The way I treated you was wrong. You deserve better.”
She crossed her arms, her cautious gaze shifting from his face to his chest and back again. “What do you want, Pike? Why did you follow me?”
“I heard you were breaking horses for your dad,” he said, because it was the truth and because he needed to buy himself time to figure out how to say all the other things racing through his head. “Sawyer told me you were thrown and hurt your hip, but it could have been a lot worse. You could have died, Tuls, and your life is worth a lot more than the few hundred dollars a month you’re clearing saddle-breaking those animals.”
“I appreciate the concern, but what I do to make a living is none of your business.” She frowned, but her mouth remained soft, making him think she wasn’t really mad. At least not yet. “Is that all?”
Pike swallowed hard, anxiety swarming across his skin like ants on a birthday cake. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been this nervous. But he’d never wanted to say the right thing as much as he did right now. Back when they were kids, he’d been too stupid to realize how easy it would be to lose what they had. Now he knew all too well that one wrong word could ruin what might be his last shot to see if there was something alive and in need of saving, hidden among the wreckage of their failed love.
His tongue slipped out to dampen his lip as his thoughts whirled. What the hell was he going to say? How did a man even start in a fucked up situation like this one?
Tulsi’s brows lifted. “Are you okay?”
Pike cursed. “No, I’m not. I’m no good at this part and you know it.”
Surprise softened her features, and when she spoke, her words were a whisper barely audible over the leaves rustling overhead. “What do you mean?”
“You know what I mean,” he said, heart slamming in his chest. “I’m still in love with you, Tuls.”
Her eyes flew wide. “What?”
“I’m still in love with you,” he repeated, refusing to back down even if he couldn’t tell if that look on her face was shock or horror. “I never stopped loving you, and I don’t think I ever will.”
Tulsi shook her head numbly side to side, but before she could tell him he was crazy, Pike slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her close, cutting off the words he couldn’t stand to hear with a kiss.
For a moment, she stiffened against him and fear that she was going to push him away shivered across his skin. But then she moaned against his lips—a sad, hungry sound that echoed through his soul—and twined her arms around his neck. She hugged him tight and opened for him, her tongue swirling against his with the same shameless passion he remembered.
But this kiss was even better than all the kisses that had come before because now Pike knew how torturous it was to live without them. This kiss was priceless, perfect, and so bittersweet that he groaned in pleasure-pain as he crushed Tulsi closer, knowing she’d never be close enough.
How had he survived for so long without her? She was the treasure he’d been hunting for, the precious thing he’d lost, and all the proof he needed to believe in miracles. Her love was the best reason he’d ever had for living, the only thing worth dying for, and now that he had Tulsi back in his arms he never, ever wanted to let her go.
CHAPTERTEN
Tulsi
Tulsi stood on tiptoe,knocking Pike’s hat into the water as she drove her hands into his soft hair, kissing him with an intensity that left her breathless. But she didn’t need to breathe. She needed Pike’s lips bruising hers and his taste filling her mouth, banishing the memory of every kiss she’d shared with men who weren’t this man.
No one else had ever been able to make her feel this way—so wild and desperate. With other men, she remained in control and conscious of all the roles she played outside of the bedroom. With Pike she was pure need, pure desire. She didn’t care about playing nice or following the rules. She and Pike were a brush fire and a hot desert wind. He fueled every primal instinct inside of her, leaving no room for shame or doubt.
When he picked her up in his arms, she didn’t hesitate to wrap her legs around his waist and lock her ankles at the small of his back. She didn’t try to hold back the moan that burst from her lips as his erection pressed against her through their jeans, bringing her body even more savagely to life. She only kissed him harder, her breath coming faster as she circled her hips, grinding against the long, thick length of him, their tongues tangling and Pike’s hand tugging roughly at the top of her shirt.
He freed her breast to the warm air, fingers capturing her nipple and rolling it hard enough to send sharp waves of longing coursing through her body. She gasped into his mouth, fingers digging into his shoulders as the tension building inside of her twisted up another notch.
“God, Tulsi, you’re killing me,” he mumbled against her lips. “If we don’t stop now, I’m going to take you right here in the river.”