“No, Avery. I thought my girlfriend died three years ago. Now, as I am standing here in this casino, I see her plain as day. Someone needs to tell me what the hell is going on,” Allan demanded.
Images of his angry and nasty tone began to play through my mind. He never loved me the way he swore he did. Instead, he loved the idea of us.
“Back up,” Chase stated, through gritted teeth.
“Who the hell are you?” Allan asked, clearly not seeing the anger boiling inside of Chase.
“I am the guy who is about to kick your ass if you don’t get away from my girl,” Chase growled again. He stepped closer to Allan and forced his chest against Allan’s.
“Stop!” I cried out, finally finding a voice. “Allan, I will explain this to you. Just please go wait in the bar,” I pleaded as I pointed to the bar across the room.
“No!” Chase yelled, as he pushed me back and away from Allan. “You are not going anywhere with him,” he stated with menacing words.
“Elizabeth, are you really going to let this guy talk to you like that?” Allan asked, as he looked at me with pity in his eyes.
I hated the look he was giving me. I despised what that look meant. I was brought back to the same girl that didn’t have a voice or opinion and that wasn’t who I was going to be anymore.
“Chase, I love you, but I am going to do this,” I said, as I removed his arm from around my body.
Stunned, Chase looked down at his empty arms before tearing his gaze back up to my face. Pain seared across his features as I told him he couldn’t control this part of my life.
“Chase, come with me. We will go sit with Jax and be able to watch them,” Avery whispered to Chase.
Chase only stood with his fists clenched at his sides as he looked between Allan and myself. “Lizzie, what are you going to do?” Chase asked again, as his eyes bore into me.
“I am going to go talk to Allan,” I stuttered, as I struggled to remain calm.
What I really wanted to do was to jump into Chase’s arms and have him take me away from here. I wanted to lock myself up in our own little world where no one else existed except the two of us. However, I knew that dream could never become my reality unless I found closure with my past.
Huffing, Chase followed Avery as Jax made his way off the elevator. I watched as the three exchanged words and then found a table in the back of the bar. I knew what I was about to do was dangerous and could ruin everything I had worked so hard to maintain.
“Follow me,” I said, as I began to lead Allan into the bar.
He still looked confused, like he had literally seen a ghost, but he did oblige.
As we sat down, Allan finally gave in and exploded. “Elizabeth, enough with this game. I demand to know why I am sitting here with you right now. What happened the night of the fire?”
His eyes were full of confusion and a touch of hurt and I couldn’t help but feel a little guilty for faking my own death.
Sighing, I held my hands in my lap as I began to explain. “Allan, the night of the fire changed my life forever. You know I had never had the greatest relationship with my parents,” I said, as Allan looked at me like he wasn’t following.
Cutting in, Allan gave me an exasperated look. “Elizabeth, you aren’t making any sense,” he said with a gruff.
“Let me finish before you say anything else,” I demanded, as I needed to get my words out before I lost the ability to be brave.
With wide eyes, Allan sat back in his seat and waved for me to continue. In his mind, he was being sweet by allowing me to talk. That small act reminded me that what I was doing was right.
“Anyway, I did care about you, but I never did love you. I couldn’t love anyone because I don’t think anyone really, truly loved me. After my parent’s party, I woke up that night to my room full of deep smoke. I managed to escape but when I did, I found my parents had already made their way out of the house and didn’t even bother to look for me. Everyone assumed I was dead and I just didn’t correct them. I realized in that moment as I hid in the darkness, that I could run away and be the person I had always wanted to be. My family wanted me to go to business school. I wanted to go to graphic design school. I wanted to be with someone who drove me absolutely crazy and wild and who felt about me the way I felt about them. As much as we looked the part of a great couple, we never were.”
“I left, allowing everyone to believe I was dead because I found an opportunity to change the course of my life. I can now be who I want- and what I want is to be happy. Please don’t ruin what I have worked so hard to accomplish. I don’t want my family to know I am here or that I am alive.”
I stopped talking and allowed my words to sink in with Allan. Deep down, he had to know what I was saying was true. In the two years we had been a couple, he had never heard my parents say a nice word to me or honestly, I never looked happy around them. He was smart, he had to know I wasn’t a happy person. Not with my family and not with him.
Taking a deep breath, Allan ran a hand through his wavy blond hair. His crisp polo shirt and khakis made him the stark opposite of my Chase. They were as different as night and day and the more I sat there looking at Allan, I began to fully understand how much I had changed since meeting Chase. He made me happy and I loved him more than anything.
“Lizzie, I honestly don’t know what to say. I knew at times it was rough with your parents, but I didn’t realize how depressed you were. When you died, I mean, when we all thought you died, I went to your memorial. I grieved the loss of the girl who I had cared for. This all makes sense now. There wasn’t a body to view, the police and firefighters thought your body had been destroyed in the fire. I had been so upset that I didn’t know what to do with myself. I made you up to be the love of my life. But now, I see it all very clearly that you were never happy, even with me. The look you have now on your face is full of confidence and to be honest, you are glowing. I have never seen you look like that before.”
Pausing Allan gulped before saying the rest. “I can tell you love him.”